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<blockquote data-quote="CrazyinVA" data-source="post: 302455" data-attributes="member: 1157"><p>Youngest is back to planning to move in with boyfriend/fiance. She's already arranged to have my grandson's medicaid transferred to the new county effective 9/11. As I've stated before, she'll lose all public assistance (other than gs's medicaid) and become 100&#37; dependent on her boyfriend. She's talking about going to school and not even working. While I admire her goals, I'm pretty frightened of her being so dependent on someone else. She's pouring on the guilt trip about my not babysitting grandson on a more regular basis "like other people's parents do" so she can doesn't have to pay a sitter. Excuse me if I want my own life right now. I adore him, I watch him occasionally, and I love spending time with him, but my needs and wants are coming first right now, and I'm enjoying the heck out of that. So sue me.</p><p></p><p>Oldest is $200 short on her very first rent payment in her new apartment. I will not loan her this money (couldn't even if I wanted to, actually). I knew she couldn't afford this apartment, but there was no telling her otherwise. Her weekend bartending job has very unpredictable pay. She says she's looking for something else; but past experience tells me her version of "looking" is to put a couple applications, never follow up, and play on the computer or sleep all day. Why is it her friends find jobs, my friends find jobs, but she can't? Her [lack of] hygiene has something to do with it, I suspect.. among other things. </p><p></p><p>I'm just so tired of being disappointed in my children's choices. Neither will attend therapy or evaluate the need for medications. Nope ,not my choices, I know, not my problems... repeat, repeat, repeat. I need to detach myself more and remind myself of the pat answers I used to be so good at giving. But dang, it gets exhausting sometimes, constantly walking on eggshells.</p><p></p><p>Which reminds me, I should re-read that book again, too. (great book re Borderline (BPD))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CrazyinVA, post: 302455, member: 1157"] Youngest is back to planning to move in with boyfriend/fiance. She's already arranged to have my grandson's medicaid transferred to the new county effective 9/11. As I've stated before, she'll lose all public assistance (other than gs's medicaid) and become 100% dependent on her boyfriend. She's talking about going to school and not even working. While I admire her goals, I'm pretty frightened of her being so dependent on someone else. She's pouring on the guilt trip about my not babysitting grandson on a more regular basis "like other people's parents do" so she can doesn't have to pay a sitter. Excuse me if I want my own life right now. I adore him, I watch him occasionally, and I love spending time with him, but my needs and wants are coming first right now, and I'm enjoying the heck out of that. So sue me. Oldest is $200 short on her very first rent payment in her new apartment. I will not loan her this money (couldn't even if I wanted to, actually). I knew she couldn't afford this apartment, but there was no telling her otherwise. Her weekend bartending job has very unpredictable pay. She says she's looking for something else; but past experience tells me her version of "looking" is to put a couple applications, never follow up, and play on the computer or sleep all day. Why is it her friends find jobs, my friends find jobs, but she can't? Her [lack of] hygiene has something to do with it, I suspect.. among other things. I'm just so tired of being disappointed in my children's choices. Neither will attend therapy or evaluate the need for medications. Nope ,not my choices, I know, not my problems... repeat, repeat, repeat. I need to detach myself more and remind myself of the pat answers I used to be so good at giving. But dang, it gets exhausting sometimes, constantly walking on eggshells. Which reminds me, I should re-read that book again, too. (great book re Borderline (BPD)) [/QUOTE]
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