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Do you throw them out? What are YOUR feelings ? Explain your detachment.
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<blockquote data-quote="1905" data-source="post: 414548" data-attributes="member: 2668"><p>My difficult child was 18, 3 months after his high school graduation we "kicked him out" and had a restraining order in place. Now, we have a great relationship and he's close with his brothers, I just saw him this morning. He supports himself, although he still is very much a difficult child, I detatched enough to let him live his life and keep my mouth shut.</p><p> </p><p>He has ODD. He stole anything not tied down, I had to hide things, but he stole ANYTHING. He was violent at home, broke many things- never did one chore, he would break the shovel, rake or tool. Broke pencils refusing to do homework, punched holes in the walls and beat up his brothers for fun, suspended from school many times, threatened teachers, made a hit list, mostly fighting. He stole the money from a fundraiser and I could go on an on...</p><p>Living with him was a TOTAL nightmare. My words aren't coming close to doing the situation justice, but he lied constantly about nothing, and I mean he would make up these outrageous crazy stories.... he still lies constantly, I let anything he says roll off back. </p><p> </p><p>After high school, he decided to join the Marines, but was kicked out before he even went to bootcamp. So.....he refused to work, sat on the couch, and said "why should I?" when we told him to get a job. And in reality, why should he? we supported him and he stole. Well in Sept after his graduation I went to work, husband went to work, and we couldn't trust him so we told him to leave while we weren't home. He left. I locked the door. He broke it down as soon as I went to work and robbed the house. Long story short...we needed him to get a huge wake-up call. He had it good, he should have just gotten a job! We had to get a restraining order to keep him away. He got a job in a casino and had to live in a filthy rooming house, but (YAY) he saw what you need to do to survive and he had NO CHOICE so he did it. He then saved and got an apt. Shortcut to now- husband got him in his union, the work ethic isn't the best, nor the attitiude, but he works! He supports himself. He lives 5 minutes from us and we see himoften. I'm happy he's living the life he wants. The best thing I ever did was to get that restraining order.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="1905, post: 414548, member: 2668"] My difficult child was 18, 3 months after his high school graduation we "kicked him out" and had a restraining order in place. Now, we have a great relationship and he's close with his brothers, I just saw him this morning. He supports himself, although he still is very much a difficult child, I detatched enough to let him live his life and keep my mouth shut. He has ODD. He stole anything not tied down, I had to hide things, but he stole ANYTHING. He was violent at home, broke many things- never did one chore, he would break the shovel, rake or tool. Broke pencils refusing to do homework, punched holes in the walls and beat up his brothers for fun, suspended from school many times, threatened teachers, made a hit list, mostly fighting. He stole the money from a fundraiser and I could go on an on... Living with him was a TOTAL nightmare. My words aren't coming close to doing the situation justice, but he lied constantly about nothing, and I mean he would make up these outrageous crazy stories.... he still lies constantly, I let anything he says roll off back. After high school, he decided to join the Marines, but was kicked out before he even went to bootcamp. So.....he refused to work, sat on the couch, and said "why should I?" when we told him to get a job. And in reality, why should he? we supported him and he stole. Well in Sept after his graduation I went to work, husband went to work, and we couldn't trust him so we told him to leave while we weren't home. He left. I locked the door. He broke it down as soon as I went to work and robbed the house. Long story short...we needed him to get a huge wake-up call. He had it good, he should have just gotten a job! We had to get a restraining order to keep him away. He got a job in a casino and had to live in a filthy rooming house, but (YAY) he saw what you need to do to survive and he had NO CHOICE so he did it. He then saved and got an apt. Shortcut to now- husband got him in his union, the work ethic isn't the best, nor the attitiude, but he works! He supports himself. He lives 5 minutes from us and we see himoften. I'm happy he's living the life he wants. The best thing I ever did was to get that restraining order. [/QUOTE]
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Do you throw them out? What are YOUR feelings ? Explain your detachment.
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