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Does it ever get better? Daughter forged my checks
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 609553"><p>First off, I'm so sorry that you are going through so much difficulty and stress with your adult children.</p><p>my first quick knee jerk response to your question about does it get better was: No!</p><p>But...</p><p>1. I have a easy child son, that went through a difficult child year in high school and it was a doozy. We lived in a war zone. We sent him to boarding school and his behavior changed 180 degrees. When he got back, we took the "tough love" approach with him. He is a super easy child now. Very successful. But we put up with NADA! </p><p>BIG CHANGE for the better!</p><p>however....</p><p>2. We have a difficult child adopted daughter. Has been difficult child her entire life. She is in her mid twenties now and can't hold down even a part time job. She is on disability. She is on food stamps, but spends her food money for the month often within ten days. She truly is disabled, but I often wish she could just do the basics and stop the non stop weirdness and DRAMA. </p><p>She hasn't changed much...but I have changed my reaction to her. Last night she begged me for food (once again) and I gave her some food from the house left over, etc. I found for a brief moment, emotion welling up, and I immediately rid myself of it. She was wearing the same clothes she wore yesterday and I quickly dismissed this thought. I gave her the food, smiled, and sent her quickly on her way. That was it. That was that. Period. I CHOSE not to make a big deal of it. BIG CHANGE for the better! Of course, things got easier once she moved out!!!!!!!! </p><p></p><p>I agree, get a safe and keep that safe in a locked room. Consider filing charges.</p><p>If at all possible, I would get these adult children OUT of your home.Just read that you see a therapist and that is wonderful!</p><p></p><p>This is hard stuff. Try not to let their accusations and/or bad behavior "get" to you. In one ear and out the other. Chose to ignore it and insist on better treatment. Consider finding out what your legal rights are in removing them from your home...and chose to not be emotional about it. Difficult, true...but likely VERY necessary.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 609553"] First off, I'm so sorry that you are going through so much difficulty and stress with your adult children. my first quick knee jerk response to your question about does it get better was: No! But... 1. I have a easy child son, that went through a difficult child year in high school and it was a doozy. We lived in a war zone. We sent him to boarding school and his behavior changed 180 degrees. When he got back, we took the "tough love" approach with him. He is a super easy child now. Very successful. But we put up with NADA! BIG CHANGE for the better! however.... 2. We have a difficult child adopted daughter. Has been difficult child her entire life. She is in her mid twenties now and can't hold down even a part time job. She is on disability. She is on food stamps, but spends her food money for the month often within ten days. She truly is disabled, but I often wish she could just do the basics and stop the non stop weirdness and DRAMA. She hasn't changed much...but I have changed my reaction to her. Last night she begged me for food (once again) and I gave her some food from the house left over, etc. I found for a brief moment, emotion welling up, and I immediately rid myself of it. She was wearing the same clothes she wore yesterday and I quickly dismissed this thought. I gave her the food, smiled, and sent her quickly on her way. That was it. That was that. Period. I CHOSE not to make a big deal of it. BIG CHANGE for the better! Of course, things got easier once she moved out!!!!!!!! I agree, get a safe and keep that safe in a locked room. Consider filing charges. If at all possible, I would get these adult children OUT of your home.Just read that you see a therapist and that is wonderful! This is hard stuff. Try not to let their accusations and/or bad behavior "get" to you. In one ear and out the other. Chose to ignore it and insist on better treatment. Consider finding out what your legal rights are in removing them from your home...and chose to not be emotional about it. Difficult, true...but likely VERY necessary. [/QUOTE]
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