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Parent Emeritus
Doing well detaching; but some days it is HAAAARRRRRD
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<blockquote data-quote="scent of cedar" data-source="post: 610753" data-attributes="member: 1721"><p>Nomad, my heart goes out to you. I am so sorry this is happening. It's like we are being tortured, isn't it. </p><p></p><p>Could you call Social Services and explain that you feel difficult child is on disability and needs some kind of supervisory help, but that she refuses to call, herself? At least you would learn whether there is such a program. Last summer, when we were all in a hot mess over difficult child and then, learned granddaughter was ~BOOM~ coming home to live with difficult child, I called Social Services and just told them I wanted to talk to someone about what to do, next. I was transferred to the right person the first time, and she was really helpful. I learned a lot. Just knowing how I would go about doing whatever it was I needed to do was a comfort to me.</p><p></p><p>I was prepared.</p><p></p><p>I think that desperate uncertainty we feel when we are up against the wall with our difficult children is the worst thing we go through because, when it is happening, our minds keep circling and circling the same issues, trying to find a better way to do what needs to be done. Detaching from the pain and the worry is almost impossible ~ at least, it is for me. </p><p></p><p>As Recovering tells us, Nomad, it will help to picture your difficult child in the palm of God's hand. To that, I would add that I would often picture myself right in there with her...that imagery does help with the immediacy of the pain and worry.</p><p></p><p>Are you using the Serenity Prayer? I will post it for you, just in case. I was told to read it until I got it. I read it and read it, Nomad...and it helped me.</p><p></p><p>God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change</p><p>The Courage to change the things I can</p><p>And the Wisdom to know the difference.</p><p></p><p>The other thing that I have found so helpful in just surviving the horror our difficult child kids put us through is the Joel Osteen materials. There is hope there, Nomad. And comfort.</p><p></p><p>When I am really upset, music will sometimes change that for me. Here is a secret: I have been watching country western videos first thing in the morning. They seem to put a little space between whatever I have been dreaming about and the day. This morning? It was Miranda Lambert's All Kinds of Kinds. </p><p></p><p>Perfect.</p><p></p><p>That one is about acceptance.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="scent of cedar, post: 610753, member: 1721"] Nomad, my heart goes out to you. I am so sorry this is happening. It's like we are being tortured, isn't it. Could you call Social Services and explain that you feel difficult child is on disability and needs some kind of supervisory help, but that she refuses to call, herself? At least you would learn whether there is such a program. Last summer, when we were all in a hot mess over difficult child and then, learned granddaughter was ~BOOM~ coming home to live with difficult child, I called Social Services and just told them I wanted to talk to someone about what to do, next. I was transferred to the right person the first time, and she was really helpful. I learned a lot. Just knowing how I would go about doing whatever it was I needed to do was a comfort to me. I was prepared. I think that desperate uncertainty we feel when we are up against the wall with our difficult children is the worst thing we go through because, when it is happening, our minds keep circling and circling the same issues, trying to find a better way to do what needs to be done. Detaching from the pain and the worry is almost impossible ~ at least, it is for me. As Recovering tells us, Nomad, it will help to picture your difficult child in the palm of God's hand. To that, I would add that I would often picture myself right in there with her...that imagery does help with the immediacy of the pain and worry. Are you using the Serenity Prayer? I will post it for you, just in case. I was told to read it until I got it. I read it and read it, Nomad...and it helped me. God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change The Courage to change the things I can And the Wisdom to know the difference. The other thing that I have found so helpful in just surviving the horror our difficult child kids put us through is the Joel Osteen materials. There is hope there, Nomad. And comfort. When I am really upset, music will sometimes change that for me. Here is a secret: I have been watching country western videos first thing in the morning. They seem to put a little space between whatever I have been dreaming about and the day. This morning? It was Miranda Lambert's All Kinds of Kinds. Perfect. That one is about acceptance. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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Doing well detaching; but some days it is HAAAARRRRRD
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