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General Parenting
Don't underestimate the power of BELOWING
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 432253" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Love it !!!!!</p><p></p><p>Often we have to change things to get their attention and let them know we are serious. Reminds me of hearing Wiz tell EVERYONE that the only way I speak to him is to scream and yell at him. Then I got notes from teachers, calls from relatives, even parents at school as we waited to get our kids would try to "talk" to me about this.</p><p></p><p>So one day I said every single word to him at the TOP of my lungs. From Good Morning to do you want milk with your cereal or next to it to have a good day. I told him if he wanted to play poor abused boy who's mommy only yells at him, well, we could make it true. It was a weekend and by lunch he was BEGGING me to stop yelling. Esp as each time I did infant thank you started crying - something that upset him greatly. He even called my parents and the relatives to say he had lied when he said all I did was yell. He did tell my mom that I showed him the difference and let him choose whether he wanted the way I normally spoke or for me to yell at him all the time. By the time he handed the phone to me my mother was laughing uncontrollably. She and my dad laughed for about an hour over that!! Mostly because it was SO what she would have done to us!</p><p></p><p>It is AWESOME to do things to get their attention. If you have problems with kids being too into what they are doing to pay attention to you when you ask them to do something, try finding a phrase to get their attention. We never had dessert on a regular basis, but it was probably Wiz' favorite thing int he world. So for years I would call out "chocolate chip cookies" or "chocolate pudding" or "cheesecake" or some other dessert they really liked - and then when they turned to look at me I would aks them to do whatever. I had to change the item, and had a few debates about how mean it was to say it when I didn't intend to give it to them, but it still works even after all these years. The first few months I did once in a while call out something and then NOT have a request or chore or whatever, but gave them the item I called out. NOT often, but enough that they always wondered.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 432253, member: 1233"] Love it !!!!! Often we have to change things to get their attention and let them know we are serious. Reminds me of hearing Wiz tell EVERYONE that the only way I speak to him is to scream and yell at him. Then I got notes from teachers, calls from relatives, even parents at school as we waited to get our kids would try to "talk" to me about this. So one day I said every single word to him at the TOP of my lungs. From Good Morning to do you want milk with your cereal or next to it to have a good day. I told him if he wanted to play poor abused boy who's mommy only yells at him, well, we could make it true. It was a weekend and by lunch he was BEGGING me to stop yelling. Esp as each time I did infant thank you started crying - something that upset him greatly. He even called my parents and the relatives to say he had lied when he said all I did was yell. He did tell my mom that I showed him the difference and let him choose whether he wanted the way I normally spoke or for me to yell at him all the time. By the time he handed the phone to me my mother was laughing uncontrollably. She and my dad laughed for about an hour over that!! Mostly because it was SO what she would have done to us! It is AWESOME to do things to get their attention. If you have problems with kids being too into what they are doing to pay attention to you when you ask them to do something, try finding a phrase to get their attention. We never had dessert on a regular basis, but it was probably Wiz' favorite thing int he world. So for years I would call out "chocolate chip cookies" or "chocolate pudding" or "cheesecake" or some other dessert they really liked - and then when they turned to look at me I would aks them to do whatever. I had to change the item, and had a few debates about how mean it was to say it when I didn't intend to give it to them, but it still works even after all these years. The first few months I did once in a while call out something and then NOT have a request or chore or whatever, but gave them the item I called out. NOT often, but enough that they always wondered. [/QUOTE]
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Don't underestimate the power of BELOWING
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