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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 127861" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Tina</p><p> </p><p>(((hugs)))</p><p> </p><p>I'm so sorry you had to go thru all of that, only to jump from one form of h*ll to another. Try not to be too hard on your sister. Especially since at the moment you don't know what her actual thinking was about the abuse. She did have the courage to ask you and then to go to your Mom in hopes of getting something done to put an end to it. If she is only ten years older than you she was also quite young (even if an adult) and inexperienced in how to handle the situation. She trusted your Mom to take the ball and run with it. Only Mom dropped it instead. I'm not saying your sis couldn't have taken other steps, but maybe she didn't really know how without your Mom in you two's corner.</p><p> </p><p>I'm also a survivor of sexual abuse. When I was around 11/12 an incident happened that should've sent huge red neon signs in front of my mother's eyes. Oh, I've no doubt she got the message loud and clear. If it wasn't for my older sis coming in at just the right moment and pulling her off of me, she'd have beaten me to death. Yet my abuser was treated as the victim. Think that's bad? Years later when the topic came out loud and clear due to something I was going thru with easy child and a nephew, my mother had the sheer gall to sob to me and tell me she didn't have a clue.</p><p> </p><p>Uh, okay. It went on since my earliest memories with multiple abusers, yet somehow all of this went on under her nose but she didn't have a clue. Spare me. She didn't have a clue because she didn't want to have a clue.</p><p> </p><p>I'm glad you're in therapy. Sounds like you're still dealing with these issues on an emotional level. I'm no therapist, but I wouldn't be surprised if at least some of your lack of sex drive has to due with the past. For others it goes in the opposite extreme. </p><p> </p><p>Therapy will help. Although it can be a rough journey, you'll be a far better person at the end.</p><p> </p><p>Sending many gentle ((hugs))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 127861, member: 84"] Tina (((hugs))) I'm so sorry you had to go thru all of that, only to jump from one form of h*ll to another. Try not to be too hard on your sister. Especially since at the moment you don't know what her actual thinking was about the abuse. She did have the courage to ask you and then to go to your Mom in hopes of getting something done to put an end to it. If she is only ten years older than you she was also quite young (even if an adult) and inexperienced in how to handle the situation. She trusted your Mom to take the ball and run with it. Only Mom dropped it instead. I'm not saying your sis couldn't have taken other steps, but maybe she didn't really know how without your Mom in you two's corner. I'm also a survivor of sexual abuse. When I was around 11/12 an incident happened that should've sent huge red neon signs in front of my mother's eyes. Oh, I've no doubt she got the message loud and clear. If it wasn't for my older sis coming in at just the right moment and pulling her off of me, she'd have beaten me to death. Yet my abuser was treated as the victim. Think that's bad? Years later when the topic came out loud and clear due to something I was going thru with easy child and a nephew, my mother had the sheer gall to sob to me and tell me she didn't have a clue. Uh, okay. It went on since my earliest memories with multiple abusers, yet somehow all of this went on under her nose but she didn't have a clue. Spare me. She didn't have a clue because she didn't want to have a clue. I'm glad you're in therapy. Sounds like you're still dealing with these issues on an emotional level. I'm no therapist, but I wouldn't be surprised if at least some of your lack of sex drive has to due with the past. For others it goes in the opposite extreme. Therapy will help. Although it can be a rough journey, you'll be a far better person at the end. Sending many gentle ((hugs)) [/QUOTE]
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