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Drama, oh drama! And I have no clue what has really happened, if much anything at all
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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 568255" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>Much ado over nothing, or over very little at least. That it turned out to be once again. I probably never get used to what a drama queen extraordinaire my difficult child is. He doesn't do it on purpose, I think, I have to give him that. And he is the one who suffers a most, and for that moment it is very real to him, so not much use of getting angry with him. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/sigh.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":sigh:" title="sigh :sigh:" data-shortname=":sigh:" /></p><p></p><p>I had a long chat with his coach. Reason he had given me a call was something mostly different than this day's escapades. It was good to hear more objective version about all that. difficult child had really bolted middle of the event, but it had been after he had done his assigned tasks, there was only fifteen minutes or less left and not much anyone even noticed he went missing. And there had really been this erratic and obnoxious guy who had harassed also some other players than difficult child before he was escorted out. In fact according the coach difficult child had done well. This kind of events tend to be little difficult and uncomfortable for many less experienced players who have not used to that kind of attention and especially for those with more introverted personality. So they had made sure difficult child was placed to a nice structured activity for smaller kids with several adult helpers to keep it organized. And apparently he did good, even made some new very devoted fans for himself in under four feet category (and among their moms.) That activity had ended and he was going around giving autographs when he bolted. Coach had talked with their sports director and they were planning to scold difficult child tomorrow, talk with him about why he bolted instead of choosing some better way of action (like going to security and asking them to escort the guy out or simply going to tell about a guy to some of other players or team management if he didn't know what to do) and punish him depending his attitude over it. Likely punishment is to 'make up' the skipped work by doing something else, likely helping team's service managers if they can come up with something for him to do for hour or two. Doesn't sound worth much dramatics, does it?</p><p></p><p>Stair jumping-incident was more a reason for his call. difficult child has according to coach been antsy, irritative and all the way difficult whole week. Has been trying to pick fight especially with the coach but also with some others. Coach then give him that and coach really ended up making difficult child jump stairs for hours (or 'two and half hours, 2.45 at tops, he is exasperating' if you believe the coach) because he declined to pick up a trash he had thrown past the waste basket. And pop corns were involved, coach made a show about it and made himself some pop corns and explained to difficult child that if he demands to make display out of himself he will honour it with right accessories. And it really took difficult child that long before he decided he would rather go to pick a trash than continue jumping. So yeah, he certainly was giving some serious attitude to the coach. Okay, difficult child was probably stuck also during that, but he did bring it to himself. And one of his saving graces is a great sense of self irony, so when he calms down he will be able to laugh for that one. I personally think the coach has patience of the saint, because he just didn't crab the nearest bat and beat some sense to him with it. I mean, two and half hours over picking a trash he threw on the floor?!? He is nineteen for G** sake!<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/groooansmileyf.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":groan:" title="groan :groan:" data-shortname=":groan:" /></p><p></p><p>Coach wanted to know if I know if difficult child have something new going on in his personal life or is this just his frustration over difficult fall and nothing going like difficult child would hope for. He also tried to pry if there is anything going on with the former coach and him maybe intervening, some rivalry going on between them I guess. Not getting involved with that.</p><p></p><p>The thing he is worried with difficult child's behaviour is that his trust issues seem to be getting worse. He is doing better with many of the goals in his behavioural plan, but not with that. Instead he is not talking almost anything personal to the coach any more, is quiet among the team, doesn't seem to trust any of them. And newest one is that he isn't trusting their massage therapists. He doesn't ask to be massaged and when he is reminded about it, he is evasive and then skips an appointment. And if they get him to the table he doesn't relax. He doesn't actually decline from it, probably because he knows he needs it, but he does his best to not make it work. That is not totally new to him, apparently masseurs have always had to make it very calm and private around him to get him to relax and he has seemed to trust only other of their masseurs, but now even the things that used to work don't work any more.</p><p></p><p>difficult child's mental coach is tied up with other client far away from home, but the coach tries to have at least a phone meeting with him to talk about these things before Christmas. He called me to give me heads up and to get my input.</p><p></p><p>So difficult child definitely over reacted big time. He did calm up eventually and called me. not happy with himself, but at least calm. I think we will have a discussion about this when he comes home. Didn't feel having it over the phone.</p><p></p><p>I also don't like about how his girlfriend behaved. Okay, her dramatics can be explained by her coming from the party and being tipsy. Some people get melodramatic when they are drunk and no one is their most logical then. And I'm sure most of us would get upset if we felt our SO is jeopardising their workplace by behaving irresponsible and stupid. I give her that. But I really don't like the things she was saying to difficult child while we were talking on the phone. Some were degrading. I certainly don't like that she was pushing, slapping and apparently scratching difficult child. Okay, difficult child is feet taller and 80 pounds heavier than her and not likely to get seriously hurt or even afraid if she only uses her hands. But still no one should be submitted to violence on their own home.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 568255, member: 14557"] Much ado over nothing, or over very little at least. That it turned out to be once again. I probably never get used to what a drama queen extraordinaire my difficult child is. He doesn't do it on purpose, I think, I have to give him that. And he is the one who suffers a most, and for that moment it is very real to him, so not much use of getting angry with him. :sigh: I had a long chat with his coach. Reason he had given me a call was something mostly different than this day's escapades. It was good to hear more objective version about all that. difficult child had really bolted middle of the event, but it had been after he had done his assigned tasks, there was only fifteen minutes or less left and not much anyone even noticed he went missing. And there had really been this erratic and obnoxious guy who had harassed also some other players than difficult child before he was escorted out. In fact according the coach difficult child had done well. This kind of events tend to be little difficult and uncomfortable for many less experienced players who have not used to that kind of attention and especially for those with more introverted personality. So they had made sure difficult child was placed to a nice structured activity for smaller kids with several adult helpers to keep it organized. And apparently he did good, even made some new very devoted fans for himself in under four feet category (and among their moms.) That activity had ended and he was going around giving autographs when he bolted. Coach had talked with their sports director and they were planning to scold difficult child tomorrow, talk with him about why he bolted instead of choosing some better way of action (like going to security and asking them to escort the guy out or simply going to tell about a guy to some of other players or team management if he didn't know what to do) and punish him depending his attitude over it. Likely punishment is to 'make up' the skipped work by doing something else, likely helping team's service managers if they can come up with something for him to do for hour or two. Doesn't sound worth much dramatics, does it? Stair jumping-incident was more a reason for his call. difficult child has according to coach been antsy, irritative and all the way difficult whole week. Has been trying to pick fight especially with the coach but also with some others. Coach then give him that and coach really ended up making difficult child jump stairs for hours (or 'two and half hours, 2.45 at tops, he is exasperating' if you believe the coach) because he declined to pick up a trash he had thrown past the waste basket. And pop corns were involved, coach made a show about it and made himself some pop corns and explained to difficult child that if he demands to make display out of himself he will honour it with right accessories. And it really took difficult child that long before he decided he would rather go to pick a trash than continue jumping. So yeah, he certainly was giving some serious attitude to the coach. Okay, difficult child was probably stuck also during that, but he did bring it to himself. And one of his saving graces is a great sense of self irony, so when he calms down he will be able to laugh for that one. I personally think the coach has patience of the saint, because he just didn't crab the nearest bat and beat some sense to him with it. I mean, two and half hours over picking a trash he threw on the floor?!? He is nineteen for G** sake!:groan: Coach wanted to know if I know if difficult child have something new going on in his personal life or is this just his frustration over difficult fall and nothing going like difficult child would hope for. He also tried to pry if there is anything going on with the former coach and him maybe intervening, some rivalry going on between them I guess. Not getting involved with that. The thing he is worried with difficult child's behaviour is that his trust issues seem to be getting worse. He is doing better with many of the goals in his behavioural plan, but not with that. Instead he is not talking almost anything personal to the coach any more, is quiet among the team, doesn't seem to trust any of them. And newest one is that he isn't trusting their massage therapists. He doesn't ask to be massaged and when he is reminded about it, he is evasive and then skips an appointment. And if they get him to the table he doesn't relax. He doesn't actually decline from it, probably because he knows he needs it, but he does his best to not make it work. That is not totally new to him, apparently masseurs have always had to make it very calm and private around him to get him to relax and he has seemed to trust only other of their masseurs, but now even the things that used to work don't work any more. difficult child's mental coach is tied up with other client far away from home, but the coach tries to have at least a phone meeting with him to talk about these things before Christmas. He called me to give me heads up and to get my input. So difficult child definitely over reacted big time. He did calm up eventually and called me. not happy with himself, but at least calm. I think we will have a discussion about this when he comes home. Didn't feel having it over the phone. I also don't like about how his girlfriend behaved. Okay, her dramatics can be explained by her coming from the party and being tipsy. Some people get melodramatic when they are drunk and no one is their most logical then. And I'm sure most of us would get upset if we felt our SO is jeopardising their workplace by behaving irresponsible and stupid. I give her that. But I really don't like the things she was saying to difficult child while we were talking on the phone. Some were degrading. I certainly don't like that she was pushing, slapping and apparently scratching difficult child. Okay, difficult child is feet taller and 80 pounds heavier than her and not likely to get seriously hurt or even afraid if she only uses her hands. But still no one should be submitted to violence on their own home. [/QUOTE]
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Drama, oh drama! And I have no clue what has really happened, if much anything at all
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