Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by gcvmom, Oct 15, 2008.

  1. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    is how I'm feeling today about difficult child 2. Pardon my mini-rant :D

    He's been working on a language arts project for the past month -- mostly in class. It was due last Friday. He brought the assignment home Wednesday or Thursday to finish the coloring as the writing portion was finished (these are literary "trading cards" -- one side has info about a literary quote, the other has an accompanying drawing).

    Friday morning, he could not find the project. We've turned the house upside down looking for it. It's not in his backpack. It's not at school. And of course, he can't remember what he did with it.

    Sigh. We just bumped his medications Monday night, and things seem to be better in terms of his recall ability and mental organization, so hopefully issues like this will get better. I'm just tired of feeling like I'm trying to help him manage one crisis after another -- between the homework detentions he seems to get every other week and now this... I'm just tired of it.

    Okay. Rant done. We now return you to our regular board programming...
  2. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    I guess "the dog ate my homework" won't work in this instance.

    Seriously, I'm sorry. We've suffered through episodes like this, and it sure ain't fun. Sometimes the projects show up; sometimes they never see the light of day.

    Why is difficult child getting homework detentions? Wouldn't he be exempt under his IEP?
  3. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    While he is allowed extra time to complete tasks and modified (ex: reduced number of math problems as needed) assignments they don't really address assingments that he just plain doesn't do. Sometimes he doesn't write the assignment down. Sometimes he forgets to bring it home. Sometimes he loses it (as in this case).

    If he misses three assignments, he gets a 20 minute homework detention after school on a Friday. For example, he left his math assignment at home today (it was finished, just not turned in) and this was his third missed assignment, so he gets the detention. They actually are given time to do school work during detention and he says he gets a lot done, so I'm not really complaining too much about that.

    I do think his teachers could do with a reminder that he needs to be allowed extra time, per his IEP.

    Anyway, much of his problems can be helped with the proper medications in place, because he hasn't always been like this. It's my hope he'll get back to that point one day soon. :)
  4. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Hooraaaay! Hooraaaay!

    He found his missing project!!! :D

  5. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    What a great relief! Where was it?

    One year easy child had a science project due - she had it typed on her laptop but then our printer decided not to work. We were visiting my sister in the cities so went to a nearby Kinkos (I think that was it) and had to figure out how to pull her project up and transfer it to their computer so it could be printed. It was a total panic weekend until it got figured out.

    She also was always loosing her confirmatin sermon notes. She did more notes than anyone else. I am still finding notes as I deep clean.
  6. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    It was right under everyone's nose on the art table. In plain sight. Duh.
  7. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    So glad the project has been found!:) Sorry it was such a stressful night!
  8. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    :woohoo: So glad you found it.

    These things *are* exasperating. A former co-worker (BIG pothead, but sometimes had a good thing or two come out of his mouth) used to say, "It's the ants that get you, not the elephants." The little things just wear you down.

    I would really push to get something in his IEP about checking his agenda for written assignments and someone checking to make sure he actually brings his work home. If the medications work correctly, it may only need to be a temporary thing to get him back on track.
  9. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    husband, difficult child 2 and I met with his Lang. Arts teacher this morning to review his progress report (which I got last week and had several D's and F's) and to make sure he's getting the supports he needs. Looks like things are working like they should -- it's just stuff from the beginning of the year that threw his grades off. They've actually improved since the progress report was published, so it leads me to think that the medication titration we've been working on the past few months is slowly working.

    The teacher said he is a VERY bright kid who clearly "gets" all the stuff being thrown at him, even the more abstract concepts. What really holds him back is his organizational skills. I reminded the teacher that a lot of that comes from his illness and so hopefully, as we continue to work on getting the medications right, everything will start to fall into place. In the mean time, the teacher is allowing him to bring things home to complete that aren't finished in class, and won't penalize him for missing things due to the social skills class he gets pulled out for twice a week.

    Some days the micromanagement he needs is just so draining on me. Thus my little rant. Today is better :)

    Thanks everyone!
  10. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    It *is* draining. I really feel your pain there.

    I was talking to Wynter's science teacher today and told her I was really hoping that by Quarter 2 she can start to get to the point where I don't have to sit right next to her the entire time she's doing schoolwork (part of the reason she's behind, because I haven't been physically capable). It would be such a relief to be able to breathe and have her stepping up to that on her own. Besides, it's *really* boring sitting here for hours on end watching her do her schoolwork. Constant redirection, too. I'm getting tired just thinking about it. LOL
  11. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    I have to do the same thing with difficult child 2. He sits at the diningroom table for homework, and I sit at my computer desk that's across from it so that I'm in the same room and can keep an eye on him, redirect, answer questions, etc.

    easy child/difficult child 3 accuses me of spending too much time on the computer, but because she's able to work independently and is usually in her room doing homework, she doesn't understand that I'm there so that I can monitor what's going on. I may be playing spider solitaire or reading email, but that's because I'd be bored stiff otherwise!
  12. Jena

    Jena New Member


    i'm glad you found the project!! yea! ok not sure if you posted where, but where'd you find it??? my little difficult child well she has lost projects, notebooks, socks, underwear, jeans, shirts, sneakers, clips, money, just about anything that has any value or importance to it!!! lol........... what shedoens't lose........

    scribbled up notes she writes in her closet she tosses them
    toilet paper rolls (yes without the toilet paper) she loves to save those (same closet eww)
    any type of plastic coffee cups i get from 7 eleven,
    garbage she really loves garbage.......hmmm
    a pee stained blanket that i've tried to clean ummm 30 million times, won't give it up refuses has had it since her toddler bed (yup same closet)
    and last but not least any large size corn flake that she finds in the box (she is amazed) and strongly belives it is a extrodinary thing. (those are saved for jewelry box) lol

    so i'm soo there with you! everynight we try to do homework she cannot remember lesson of day so i get out my easy child and i look it up because duhhh i can't remember anything from 4th grade i have to re teach her and then fight with her for about an hour or so to do the 15 min. worth of homework constantly redirecting the entire way till i feel as if a very large margarita and cig. are in desperate need of. :)

    it's a good time for us overall, isn't it?

    oh, difficult child also hides clothes around house if she doesn't like the material, instead of just telling me and us returning to store she hides them........

    and yea the homework detention is bs.
  13. Jena

    Jena New Member

    teacher should get detention for not reminding him and leaving post it's or notes on his desk every day and reminding every pack up time at end of day and wait maybe a reward for remembering i like to call this positive reinforcement. difficult child gets a lollipop from teacher every friday if she doens't lose anything. p.s. we havent seen alot of lollipops lately :)