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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 236384" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Terry, I just re-read my post and I didn't make something clear. I don't think your difficult child necessarily "gets it" that he has crossed some lines in taking his sister's underwear - the social taboo is about that. I think he CAN understand it, but it may need to be explained very carefully and clearly for him to understand. he may even think that because he is adopted that this doesn't apply to him (the taboo).</p><p></p><p>Also, he is NOT a sexual offender, but this kind of behavior can escalate to that point. With Wiz we had him in a group for sexual offenders as he, like your difficult child, was at the beginning levels of this. The therapist explained sexual offender behavior as being like a ladder. At the first rungs you have things like the way Wiz made fun of Jessie and her body, and the way your son is taking the underwear. As the behavior worsens, they "climb the ladder" and become more and more of a sexual predator. </p><p></p><p>The goal of the treatment group Wiz was in was to stop the young men from going any further on that "ladder", and to convince them they wanted to get OFF the ladder. I don't know how any other patients from this group are doing (this was a group that was help INSIDE the residential psychiatric hospital Wiz was in), but Wiz has TOTALLY turned around on the way he abused jessie. And he is not abusing anyone else this way, so the groups CAN work if you can find one.</p><p></p><p>I am sorry if I made it sound like your difficult child is fully aware of what he is doing and is a full-fledged sexual predator. he isn't. I actually would be willing to bet he doesn't think the social rules about incest apply to him and your easy child.</p><p></p><p>Sorry I was unclear.</p><p></p><p>Hugs,</p><p></p><p>susie</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 236384, member: 1233"] Terry, I just re-read my post and I didn't make something clear. I don't think your difficult child necessarily "gets it" that he has crossed some lines in taking his sister's underwear - the social taboo is about that. I think he CAN understand it, but it may need to be explained very carefully and clearly for him to understand. he may even think that because he is adopted that this doesn't apply to him (the taboo). Also, he is NOT a sexual offender, but this kind of behavior can escalate to that point. With Wiz we had him in a group for sexual offenders as he, like your difficult child, was at the beginning levels of this. The therapist explained sexual offender behavior as being like a ladder. At the first rungs you have things like the way Wiz made fun of Jessie and her body, and the way your son is taking the underwear. As the behavior worsens, they "climb the ladder" and become more and more of a sexual predator. The goal of the treatment group Wiz was in was to stop the young men from going any further on that "ladder", and to convince them they wanted to get OFF the ladder. I don't know how any other patients from this group are doing (this was a group that was help INSIDE the residential psychiatric hospital Wiz was in), but Wiz has TOTALLY turned around on the way he abused jessie. And he is not abusing anyone else this way, so the groups CAN work if you can find one. I am sorry if I made it sound like your difficult child is fully aware of what he is doing and is a full-fledged sexual predator. he isn't. I actually would be willing to bet he doesn't think the social rules about incest apply to him and your easy child. Sorry I was unclear. Hugs, susie [/QUOTE]
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