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easy child update.........fun never ends :) cutting school
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<blockquote data-quote="Jena" data-source="post: 224332" data-attributes="member: 4514"><p>Rotsne - Thanks for the advice, yet talking to the parents isn't an option at this point, there are HUGE issues there in his home with his alcoholic dad. I"m afraid to feed the fire over there and be responsible for his mother being abused at this point. Sounds odd I know, yet it's not good there.</p><p> </p><p>As far as me establishing a history I did all of that, which is what upsets me more. We had an incident 2 weeks ago where easy child came home covered in hickies, i dealt with it this boy had the nerve to look into my face and say i'm so sorry, i'll never do that again it was disrespectful to send her home that way. He's a real manipulator as well. 2 weeks later he's asking my daughter to perform sexual acts in our home while we are at a xmas party.</p><p> </p><p>The fault I believe strongly lies with MY DAUGHTER, with whom is making very bad choieces for some reason and doens't really have alot of respect for herself at this piont I think to lead her here.</p><p> </p><p>I've tried my best, and will continue to do so. Its easy to say oh don't send her to boarding school, etc. yet i would do whatever was necessary to try and get her to redirect all this energy to a positive place, i'm nervous at this point she wont' even finish high school with the attitude she seems to have.</p><p> </p><p>yet, I have to learn from what I see here and to some extent DETACH from this a little. She has gotten me so emotionally raw these past few days, i'm upset, christmas doesn'et feel the same. difficult child is feeling the tension, it's up to me to SET the tone in my home not easy child.</p><p> </p><p>I spent the afternoon yesterday wrapping gifts and on the phone with her counselor at school getting referrals for teen group counseling places for easy child, looking into volunteer work, etc.</p><p> </p><p>My easy child and I it's going to sounds strange, yet we are connected. In a much different way than difficult child and I. I had easy child alone many years ago, her biodad isn't in the picture (who knows if thats an issue here; therapist says no that met with her), and so i raised her alone for hte most part until i met my ex husband and married. She holds a very close place in my heart. I wanted her so badly from the time I knew I was pregnant with her, in a way in which is hard to verbalize. I love difficult child dearly, yet easy child well she's under my skin, she's so much like me, her way about her, her looks, it's often like looking into a mirror. I want so much for her, and I see her getting and achieving so little. I'm disheartened that she did what she did, than ontop of it the lies and manipulation of me.</p><p> </p><p>It's sad, and so last night I lost it pretty bad on her. After she said i know i made bad choices, i know i did. Yet everyone's doing it,what's the big deal?? the usual teenage remark. I know alot of it is typical teen stuff, yet alot of it isn't. She is on downward spiral mode. The failing grades, the lies etc.</p><p> </p><p>What type of life is she going to have? I moved her out here 3 years ago in hopes that this would give her the chance to get a better and less stressful education, have the opportunity to be around other children wtih whom were talking about college, etc.</p><p> </p><p>Yet it didn't work.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Jena, post: 224332, member: 4514"] Rotsne - Thanks for the advice, yet talking to the parents isn't an option at this point, there are HUGE issues there in his home with his alcoholic dad. I"m afraid to feed the fire over there and be responsible for his mother being abused at this point. Sounds odd I know, yet it's not good there. As far as me establishing a history I did all of that, which is what upsets me more. We had an incident 2 weeks ago where easy child came home covered in hickies, i dealt with it this boy had the nerve to look into my face and say i'm so sorry, i'll never do that again it was disrespectful to send her home that way. He's a real manipulator as well. 2 weeks later he's asking my daughter to perform sexual acts in our home while we are at a xmas party. The fault I believe strongly lies with MY DAUGHTER, with whom is making very bad choieces for some reason and doens't really have alot of respect for herself at this piont I think to lead her here. I've tried my best, and will continue to do so. Its easy to say oh don't send her to boarding school, etc. yet i would do whatever was necessary to try and get her to redirect all this energy to a positive place, i'm nervous at this point she wont' even finish high school with the attitude she seems to have. yet, I have to learn from what I see here and to some extent DETACH from this a little. She has gotten me so emotionally raw these past few days, i'm upset, christmas doesn'et feel the same. difficult child is feeling the tension, it's up to me to SET the tone in my home not easy child. I spent the afternoon yesterday wrapping gifts and on the phone with her counselor at school getting referrals for teen group counseling places for easy child, looking into volunteer work, etc. My easy child and I it's going to sounds strange, yet we are connected. In a much different way than difficult child and I. I had easy child alone many years ago, her biodad isn't in the picture (who knows if thats an issue here; therapist says no that met with her), and so i raised her alone for hte most part until i met my ex husband and married. She holds a very close place in my heart. I wanted her so badly from the time I knew I was pregnant with her, in a way in which is hard to verbalize. I love difficult child dearly, yet easy child well she's under my skin, she's so much like me, her way about her, her looks, it's often like looking into a mirror. I want so much for her, and I see her getting and achieving so little. I'm disheartened that she did what she did, than ontop of it the lies and manipulation of me. It's sad, and so last night I lost it pretty bad on her. After she said i know i made bad choices, i know i did. Yet everyone's doing it,what's the big deal?? the usual teenage remark. I know alot of it is typical teen stuff, yet alot of it isn't. She is on downward spiral mode. The failing grades, the lies etc. What type of life is she going to have? I moved her out here 3 years ago in hopes that this would give her the chance to get a better and less stressful education, have the opportunity to be around other children wtih whom were talking about college, etc. Yet it didn't work. [/QUOTE]
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