...that husband and I are closer to being on the same page, something happens to shoot my theory all to heck. difficult child was supposed to have a psychiatrist appointment this evening. I had arrangements made to have someone pick him up at our house and bring him half way to where I work. About an hour before I'm supposed to meet my friend, husband calls. difficult child basically flipped over the appointment and declared that he wasn't going, hasn't taken his medications for over a week and is FINE and he's not living here anymore. Then he grabbed some clothes and left. One of the big rules (at least on my part although husband says he agrees) is that if difficult child isn't medicated, now that he's 18, he's not living here. Period. The minute he turned 18, difficult child cancelled everything (counseling, case management, etc) except his psychiatrist. Guess he's decided to cancel that now too. I called husband on my way home from work. He was home but getting ready to leave for class. difficult child was still gone so I told husband to make sure the house was locked up as well as the garage. (difficult child does not have a key). I get home and husband may as well have just thrown the doors wide open. Nothing was locked, not even our bedroom door which is something that is ALWAYS locked when we're not home. I go around locking everything up and while I'm outside taking care of the garage, husband pulls in the drive and has difficult child with him. I haven't heard this stupendous plan yet but supposedly husband and difficult child had a chat on the way to the house and husband has it allllllllllllll figured out. What the @#$%^& is there to figure out? We've talked and talked and talked and talked to difficult child over the years....he's refusing his medications AND he's 18. What part of Out. Of. The. House. does husband not get???? (his reply? But he has nowhere to go......yeah well....that's HIS fault. NOT. ours.) I swear....husband has one reason after another why we can't kick difficult child out. He needs to finish school (this is his SECOND senior year and he's not going to graduate this time either), he has nowhere to go (that's my fault why?)....etc. I keep telling him that I can't do this much longer and he keeps telling me that he knows and understands. Uh huh. Actions speak louder than words. I'm almost ready to be the one who moves out but at the same time, I'll be d@mned if I'm run out of my own flipping home. This kid absolutely refuses to do ANYTHING to help himself or participate in his own life. Not. A. Thing. He is in bed 95 percent of the time he's home, he raises holy hell if asked to do one of his few and measly chores (ya know...'cause he lives here too), eats and drinks anything in the house even if he's been told it's for something specific or is covered in notes that say DO NOT EAT. husband gets irritated with me when I cook supper and don't tell difficult child it's ready. Sorry but this isn't a restaurant...if he wants to eat with the family, then he needs to act like a part of it. He's obviously eaten something....just look in the kitchen and you can tell. Pot pie boxes everywhere, food on the floor, cooked egg dripping and crusted down the sides of the pan and in the burner pan. (I had to take oven cleaner to the drip pans to get them clean it was so bad) If husband and I go out to eat, we have to take difficult child something home. I have so had it.