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feeling overwhelmed! any advice?
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<blockquote data-quote="TeDo" data-source="post: 545378"><p>Thank you for clearing that up for me.</p><p></p><p>Now as for your oldest, before you start blaming him for doing things intentionally, keep in mind that Aspie's (anyone on the spectrum really) think VERY differently than most of us do. That is one of the hardest lessons I have learned. You need to keep an open mind. when he says he didn't "break" it but that he pushed to hard and it exploded, he's more than likely telling you the truth. He's trying to tell you it was an accident. That is exactly the kinds of things that caused many school suspensions and severe depression. He was being accused of being intentionally disrespectful, defiant, and oppositional when it was really that he was misreading cues, acting immature, and lots of other things that were NOT intentional.</p><p></p><p>A wonderful book that got me turned around was what most here recommended called "The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene. By using his methods, I realized how VERY differently my kids think. I learned that for my kids to be successful, I needed to understand their thought processes and teach them alternatives. PLEASE read the book and very calmly implement his methods. I think you will be amazed and things will turn around. Our kids are not "naughty kids". They really, REALLY don't know any better and need to be taught things that most kids learn on their own over time from observing and participating. Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) kids don't.</p><p></p><p>Please stick around. There IS hope. I'm living proof of it even though my journey is far from over. I'm just very content that I am FINALLY on the right path. You need to find that path yet and the book will help tremendously.</p><p></p><p>Others will be around tomorrow to offer more insight. Nights are kinda slow around here.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TeDo, post: 545378"] Thank you for clearing that up for me. Now as for your oldest, before you start blaming him for doing things intentionally, keep in mind that Aspie's (anyone on the spectrum really) think VERY differently than most of us do. That is one of the hardest lessons I have learned. You need to keep an open mind. when he says he didn't "break" it but that he pushed to hard and it exploded, he's more than likely telling you the truth. He's trying to tell you it was an accident. That is exactly the kinds of things that caused many school suspensions and severe depression. He was being accused of being intentionally disrespectful, defiant, and oppositional when it was really that he was misreading cues, acting immature, and lots of other things that were NOT intentional. A wonderful book that got me turned around was what most here recommended called "The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene. By using his methods, I realized how VERY differently my kids think. I learned that for my kids to be successful, I needed to understand their thought processes and teach them alternatives. PLEASE read the book and very calmly implement his methods. I think you will be amazed and things will turn around. Our kids are not "naughty kids". They really, REALLY don't know any better and need to be taught things that most kids learn on their own over time from observing and participating. Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) kids don't. Please stick around. There IS hope. I'm living proof of it even though my journey is far from over. I'm just very content that I am FINALLY on the right path. You need to find that path yet and the book will help tremendously. Others will be around tomorrow to offer more insight. Nights are kinda slow around here. [/QUOTE]
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