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Feeling Sad about Birthday coming coming up...
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<blockquote data-quote="Tiredof33" data-source="post: 540349" data-attributes="member: 13558"><p>Nancy,</p><p>When I met my hubby 13 years ago we were both employed at the same company and he had just been transferred to my office from another state the year before.Each summer he would spend about $4000 for airfare and trips to Disney, staying in hotels, eating out at nice restaurants, etc. for his 3 daughters. We paid for EVERYTHING!</p><p></p><p>The rule was only 4 at a time (2 adults and 2 kids) so they rotated visiting us each year. After we had been together 4 years he was laid off and so he retired. The 3 daughters expected me to continue to pay for the trips. They all worked and there was no way I was going to pay to send them on vacations that were more expensive than we could afford. </p><p></p><p>They did not send Father's Day, birthday, or Christmas gifts not even a card and many times no phone calls. I was buying the 15 grands gifts and I was never send a thank you either. THEN they started asking who was the beneficiary when he died!!!</p><p></p><p>When each of the grands reached 18 we stopping sending the generous gifts that we were never thanked for, they are now all adults except for a few. BUT WE DO NOT HEAR FROM A SINGLE GRAND -- EVER!!</p><p></p><p>He was deeply hurt that his children would totally ignore him and not visit unless WE paid for it, but he has come to realize that they are selfish. About 3 years ago one of the daughters had been telling him how she could not afford to buy all of the 'start to school' stuff for her kids and about 4 months later she spent 2 weeks in Italy - he was shocked but it opened his eyes! In some respects it is his fault, he felt guilty when he divorced and he always spent money generously and gave them way too much money and they expected it to continue.</p><p></p><p>My difficult child son has never remembered my birthday and he probably never will - if I 'forgot' his I am sure he would be shocked!! He usually calls on Father's day and Mother's Day.</p><p></p><p>My daughter always remembers us both on all hoildays. I also exchange gifts with 3 sisters and my mother. Hubby and I usually go out to eat on special days or take a long weekend trip. I buy myself gifts LOL!</p><p></p><p>It sounds like you are financially secure so enjoy your money, you earned it! I have let mine know that I intend to spend it before I die LOL!!!!!!!!!!</p><p></p><p>Be kind to yourself and your husband, and as was sugested, ignore them for a while and see what happens.</p><p>(((blessings for us all)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tiredof33, post: 540349, member: 13558"] Nancy, When I met my hubby 13 years ago we were both employed at the same company and he had just been transferred to my office from another state the year before.Each summer he would spend about $4000 for airfare and trips to Disney, staying in hotels, eating out at nice restaurants, etc. for his 3 daughters. We paid for EVERYTHING! The rule was only 4 at a time (2 adults and 2 kids) so they rotated visiting us each year. After we had been together 4 years he was laid off and so he retired. The 3 daughters expected me to continue to pay for the trips. They all worked and there was no way I was going to pay to send them on vacations that were more expensive than we could afford. They did not send Father's Day, birthday, or Christmas gifts not even a card and many times no phone calls. I was buying the 15 grands gifts and I was never send a thank you either. THEN they started asking who was the beneficiary when he died!!! When each of the grands reached 18 we stopping sending the generous gifts that we were never thanked for, they are now all adults except for a few. BUT WE DO NOT HEAR FROM A SINGLE GRAND -- EVER!! He was deeply hurt that his children would totally ignore him and not visit unless WE paid for it, but he has come to realize that they are selfish. About 3 years ago one of the daughters had been telling him how she could not afford to buy all of the 'start to school' stuff for her kids and about 4 months later she spent 2 weeks in Italy - he was shocked but it opened his eyes! In some respects it is his fault, he felt guilty when he divorced and he always spent money generously and gave them way too much money and they expected it to continue. My difficult child son has never remembered my birthday and he probably never will - if I 'forgot' his I am sure he would be shocked!! He usually calls on Father's day and Mother's Day. My daughter always remembers us both on all hoildays. I also exchange gifts with 3 sisters and my mother. Hubby and I usually go out to eat on special days or take a long weekend trip. I buy myself gifts LOL! It sounds like you are financially secure so enjoy your money, you earned it! I have let mine know that I intend to spend it before I die LOL!!!!!!!!!! Be kind to yourself and your husband, and as was sugested, ignore them for a while and see what happens. (((blessings for us all))) [/QUOTE]
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