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Feeling Sad---Son is Homeless
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<blockquote data-quote="Feeling Sad" data-source="post: 705270" data-attributes="member: 19245"><p>I am very sorry about my long absence... I have been dealing with fear now living alone while completing report cards and taking 2 classes.</p><p></p><p>I am still going through the agonizing torture of missing my schizophrenic son, while fearing him at the same time and, thus, being afraid to be alone in the dark in my house. </p><p></p><p>I have become a bit of an advocate for change and have written several legislators. I received a very thoughtful response from Senator Creigh Deeds, whose paranoid schizophrenic son repeatedly stabbed him and then committed suicide. He was surprised at the lack of response by the police in my case. He has helped to bring about changes in the laws. He tried to get his son, Gus, committed, but they were asked to leave after waiting because no beds were available. The incident happened the next morning.</p><p></p><p>A great site that I have read for years for information is <a href="http://www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org" target="_blank">www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org</a> </p><p></p><p>I recommend reading the article "Raising Cain: The Role of Serious Mental Illness in Family Homicides".</p><p></p><p>A woman living at risk of her violent schizophrenic son wrote very eloquently:</p><p></p><p>''The thought of being attacked and physically harmed by another is frightening in itself, but when the attacker is your own flesh and blood, it is additional, unspeakable trauma upon trauma, as your whole body sways between love and fear".</p><p></p><p>"If a stranger were to be the attacker, you would automatically try to defend yourself, but when it is the one you love, you only try to run because your love would bind your hands".</p><p></p><p>This is why I only had a locked door and put mace by my bed...</p><p></p><p>The article states that "better data should be collected on nonlethal assaults carried out by family members with a serious mental illness. Completed homicides are merely the tip of the iceberg".</p><p></p><p>"Since women, especially older women, appear to be disproportionately victimized by sons and grandsons with serious mental illness, studies are needed that focus on the care giving role of such women and alternative living arrangements for their ill family members."</p><p></p><p>Often families are being told by the police that "we can't do anything until he or she demonstrates dangerousness. All too often such demonstrations have fatal consequences".</p><p></p><p>Three years ago, when I called the police after my son had threatened to "cut up my face", they merely told me to get an eviction and asked if I had a place to stay.</p><p></p><p>During the last incident, when my son was arguing with his voices about not wanting to kill me, they merely asked why I hadn't filed an eviction yet and told me that "it did not count as a viable threat because he did not tell me to my face". I told them that a command hallucination is much more dangerous. They wanted me to go in ALONE and ask him to come to the door. I told them that he was a paranoid schiztophrenic and that he would not go to the door.They again asked if I had a place to stay. </p><p></p><p>All 3 officers later lied to their commanding officer when there was a potential disciplinary action and said that they had offered to come into my house and that I had TURNED THEM DOWN.</p><p></p><p>"Stigma against people with mental illness will not decrease until we decrease the number of mentally ill individuals who commit violent acts, including family homicides".</p><p></p><p>I am very sad, yet extremely angry at the status quo of the present mental health system, or lack thereof.</p><p></p><p>I am sorry. This is completely opposite of 'tis the season to be jolly', but it is how I feel. </p><p></p><p>I hope that you and yours find peace during the holidays.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Feeling Sad, post: 705270, member: 19245"] I am very sorry about my long absence... I have been dealing with fear now living alone while completing report cards and taking 2 classes. I am still going through the agonizing torture of missing my schizophrenic son, while fearing him at the same time and, thus, being afraid to be alone in the dark in my house. I have become a bit of an advocate for change and have written several legislators. I received a very thoughtful response from Senator Creigh Deeds, whose paranoid schizophrenic son repeatedly stabbed him and then committed suicide. He was surprised at the lack of response by the police in my case. He has helped to bring about changes in the laws. He tried to get his son, Gus, committed, but they were asked to leave after waiting because no beds were available. The incident happened the next morning. A great site that I have read for years for information is [URL='http://www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org']www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org[/URL] I recommend reading the article "Raising Cain: The Role of Serious Mental Illness in Family Homicides". A woman living at risk of her violent schizophrenic son wrote very eloquently: ''The thought of being attacked and physically harmed by another is frightening in itself, but when the attacker is your own flesh and blood, it is additional, unspeakable trauma upon trauma, as your whole body sways between love and fear". "If a stranger were to be the attacker, you would automatically try to defend yourself, but when it is the one you love, you only try to run because your love would bind your hands". This is why I only had a locked door and put mace by my bed... The article states that "better data should be collected on nonlethal assaults carried out by family members with a serious mental illness. Completed homicides are merely the tip of the iceberg". "Since women, especially older women, appear to be disproportionately victimized by sons and grandsons with serious mental illness, studies are needed that focus on the care giving role of such women and alternative living arrangements for their ill family members." Often families are being told by the police that "we can't do anything until he or she demonstrates dangerousness. All too often such demonstrations have fatal consequences". Three years ago, when I called the police after my son had threatened to "cut up my face", they merely told me to get an eviction and asked if I had a place to stay. During the last incident, when my son was arguing with his voices about not wanting to kill me, they merely asked why I hadn't filed an eviction yet and told me that "it did not count as a viable threat because he did not tell me to my face". I told them that a command hallucination is much more dangerous. They wanted me to go in ALONE and ask him to come to the door. I told them that he was a paranoid schiztophrenic and that he would not go to the door.They again asked if I had a place to stay. All 3 officers later lied to their commanding officer when there was a potential disciplinary action and said that they had offered to come into my house and that I had TURNED THEM DOWN. "Stigma against people with mental illness will not decrease until we decrease the number of mentally ill individuals who commit violent acts, including family homicides". I am very sad, yet extremely angry at the status quo of the present mental health system, or lack thereof. I am sorry. This is completely opposite of 'tis the season to be jolly', but it is how I feel. I hope that you and yours find peace during the holidays. [/QUOTE]
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