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Fell off the wagon big time
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 560003" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>Payla, Im sorry I havent responded to your post before now. I simply missed it somehow. </p><p></p><p>You say your son is 33 right and has some sort of mental issues like ADD? He also is using drugs? Honey, its probably the drugs that are the real issues. I have a son who is 28 with ADHD, entered the Marines at 18, served 4 years, got out in 2007 and has now worked with the sheriff's dept since then and is married, bought a house and has two kids. </p><p></p><p>I also have a 26 year old who has had more severe mental and behavioral disorders most of his life and has been in trouble legally since he got old enough to be in trouble. He has finally turned himself around and is no longer smoking pot and he is now in a long term committed relationship and has two little girls. He doesnt live with me. </p><p></p><p>I also have bipolar, borderline personality disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, PTSD and a myriad of physical disorders which have disabled me since 2001. None of us got handed a get out of jail free card when they gave us our mental health diagnosis. Lord my youngest son would have loved to have had a few of those! He needed them. He did a ton of stupid things when he was younger. It has only been in the past couple of years that he has decided he needed to turn his life around. </p><p></p><p>By the time I was your son's age I was already taking care of 3 kids. Heck, I had already had 3 kids by the time I was 24. At 33, I was already dealing with one son who had been diagnosed with learning disabilities and one who had been diagnosed with ADHD and one who had been diagnosed with ADHD/ODD. </p><p></p><p>Your son is well old enough to learn to get his life together if he wants to but right now he has you to fall back on. If you give him the wings to fly on his own he will. It will also give him the inner pride of being a man which at this moment he is lacking. A man takes care of himself and his family when he has one. Depending on Mom (and or dad if he is in the picture) cannot leave him with any sense of self pride at all. He has to feel like he is still somewhat like a perpetual teen. </p><p></p><p>I agree that wintering homeless in the Northeast is not a good place to be. My suggestion would be to buy him a bus ticket to either FL or CA and ship him there. Maybe look in the paper for a boarding house you could pay a week or two on and then let him go. He can either make it or not. His choice. He will at least be warmer. You wont have to worry as much, he wont be close, you can sleep better.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 560003, member: 1514"] Payla, Im sorry I havent responded to your post before now. I simply missed it somehow. You say your son is 33 right and has some sort of mental issues like ADD? He also is using drugs? Honey, its probably the drugs that are the real issues. I have a son who is 28 with ADHD, entered the Marines at 18, served 4 years, got out in 2007 and has now worked with the sheriff's dept since then and is married, bought a house and has two kids. I also have a 26 year old who has had more severe mental and behavioral disorders most of his life and has been in trouble legally since he got old enough to be in trouble. He has finally turned himself around and is no longer smoking pot and he is now in a long term committed relationship and has two little girls. He doesnt live with me. I also have bipolar, borderline personality disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, PTSD and a myriad of physical disorders which have disabled me since 2001. None of us got handed a get out of jail free card when they gave us our mental health diagnosis. Lord my youngest son would have loved to have had a few of those! He needed them. He did a ton of stupid things when he was younger. It has only been in the past couple of years that he has decided he needed to turn his life around. By the time I was your son's age I was already taking care of 3 kids. Heck, I had already had 3 kids by the time I was 24. At 33, I was already dealing with one son who had been diagnosed with learning disabilities and one who had been diagnosed with ADHD and one who had been diagnosed with ADHD/ODD. Your son is well old enough to learn to get his life together if he wants to but right now he has you to fall back on. If you give him the wings to fly on his own he will. It will also give him the inner pride of being a man which at this moment he is lacking. A man takes care of himself and his family when he has one. Depending on Mom (and or dad if he is in the picture) cannot leave him with any sense of self pride at all. He has to feel like he is still somewhat like a perpetual teen. I agree that wintering homeless in the Northeast is not a good place to be. My suggestion would be to buy him a bus ticket to either FL or CA and ship him there. Maybe look in the paper for a boarding house you could pay a week or two on and then let him go. He can either make it or not. His choice. He will at least be warmer. You wont have to worry as much, he wont be close, you can sleep better. [/QUOTE]
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