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For those in the know, a wedding etiquette question
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<blockquote data-quote="Mattsmom277" data-source="post: 578066" data-attributes="member: 4264"><p>Here, the jack and jill thing is called a Stag and Doe. Same idea. Pay a cost to buy a ticket, bride and groom use it either for wedding costs, honeymoon, down payment for a house, whatever. It's basically a big party (think dj, booze, food but on the cheap) and although older family sometimes attend, it's more a hoot and holler whoop it up bash that mostly the bride and grooms friends, coworkers etc go to. Usually older family goes as support (think buy tickets to help bride and groom) but don't stay late, the younger crowd usually stay till the wee hours and whoop it up. Small intimate friends then can do a bachelor/bachelorette party if someone wants to host it, totally different type evening and for very select few. Best friends and bridal party type thing. The bridal shower is usually a much larger guest list, and here anyhow it's common to invite to the shower and the stag and doe (jack and jill) because people not planning to attend the wedding likely won't go to the shower and this way they have a way to show their support and celebrate a little with the couple. Some will attend all events, but it is usually not a big deal if some attend the shower and skip the stag and doe. There really here is never offense if someone accepts for one and declines the other invite, etc. </p><p></p><p>I don't think you have anything to worry about, let the new out law mother in law do her thing, your daughter is going to be her new daughter in law for life so it will get your daughter brownie points. And I'd just bow out of helping, letting it be "that wonderful special event you are doing as a gift to the kids", how wonderful blah blah blah. I'd attend, enjoy yourself. As a guest. (Not a planner, mother in law can take the credit, you don't get one more event to stress over)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mattsmom277, post: 578066, member: 4264"] Here, the jack and jill thing is called a Stag and Doe. Same idea. Pay a cost to buy a ticket, bride and groom use it either for wedding costs, honeymoon, down payment for a house, whatever. It's basically a big party (think dj, booze, food but on the cheap) and although older family sometimes attend, it's more a hoot and holler whoop it up bash that mostly the bride and grooms friends, coworkers etc go to. Usually older family goes as support (think buy tickets to help bride and groom) but don't stay late, the younger crowd usually stay till the wee hours and whoop it up. Small intimate friends then can do a bachelor/bachelorette party if someone wants to host it, totally different type evening and for very select few. Best friends and bridal party type thing. The bridal shower is usually a much larger guest list, and here anyhow it's common to invite to the shower and the stag and doe (jack and jill) because people not planning to attend the wedding likely won't go to the shower and this way they have a way to show their support and celebrate a little with the couple. Some will attend all events, but it is usually not a big deal if some attend the shower and skip the stag and doe. There really here is never offense if someone accepts for one and declines the other invite, etc. I don't think you have anything to worry about, let the new out law mother in law do her thing, your daughter is going to be her new daughter in law for life so it will get your daughter brownie points. And I'd just bow out of helping, letting it be "that wonderful special event you are doing as a gift to the kids", how wonderful blah blah blah. I'd attend, enjoy yourself. As a guest. (Not a planner, mother in law can take the credit, you don't get one more event to stress over) [/QUOTE]
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For those in the know, a wedding etiquette question
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