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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 577849" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I wish there was a magic wand I could wave to fix this. I am sorry you are hurting so.</p><p></p><p>Some of your difficult child's behavior is typical teen, though not all. She certainly has gone way overboard on the "it is MINE and YOU can't be part of it or have your own space/place in it because it is ALL mine" attitude. </p><p></p><p>How do you accept this? By knowing that even if this part of difficult child isn't outgrown, it clearly is a fault in her and not you. I would bet she feels threatened in some way, like she cannot have her own place and be her own person because she is overshadowed by your accomplishments, skill, and relationships in the community. This is her problem, but accepting that can be hard work. If you can, work with a therapist about this.</p><p></p><p>You clearly have a deep love of cheerleading and the kids you work with in that community. You add so much to the team and love doing that. Don't let anything stop you from something you love this much. offer to coach or help a team or the cheer organization in your knew area. Just because you are not a 'cheer mom' because you don't have a child who is cheering doesn't mean you cannot still be a 'cheer booster' or coach or even team/coach mentor. Someone to help new coaches figure it all out and implement it, to help and support the kids, and to share a passion with others who are passionate about it. </p><p></p><p>difficult child isn't cheering, so you are not infringing on 'her' thing. She cannot really complain because it is none of her business, and you can tell her so. </p><p></p><p>Kids need all the caring adults they can get in their lives. Many kids groups can only get parents to help, and often there are not many parents who are willing/able to help. So having someone wtih your experience, dedication and love of the sport and the kids is invaluable. Instead of retiring, find a new squad or organization to work with. I am sure there are MANY who would be absolutely thrilled to have you on board.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 577849, member: 1233"] I wish there was a magic wand I could wave to fix this. I am sorry you are hurting so. Some of your difficult child's behavior is typical teen, though not all. She certainly has gone way overboard on the "it is MINE and YOU can't be part of it or have your own space/place in it because it is ALL mine" attitude. How do you accept this? By knowing that even if this part of difficult child isn't outgrown, it clearly is a fault in her and not you. I would bet she feels threatened in some way, like she cannot have her own place and be her own person because she is overshadowed by your accomplishments, skill, and relationships in the community. This is her problem, but accepting that can be hard work. If you can, work with a therapist about this. You clearly have a deep love of cheerleading and the kids you work with in that community. You add so much to the team and love doing that. Don't let anything stop you from something you love this much. offer to coach or help a team or the cheer organization in your knew area. Just because you are not a 'cheer mom' because you don't have a child who is cheering doesn't mean you cannot still be a 'cheer booster' or coach or even team/coach mentor. Someone to help new coaches figure it all out and implement it, to help and support the kids, and to share a passion with others who are passionate about it. difficult child isn't cheering, so you are not infringing on 'her' thing. She cannot really complain because it is none of her business, and you can tell her so. Kids need all the caring adults they can get in their lives. Many kids groups can only get parents to help, and often there are not many parents who are willing/able to help. So having someone wtih your experience, dedication and love of the sport and the kids is invaluable. Instead of retiring, find a new squad or organization to work with. I am sure there are MANY who would be absolutely thrilled to have you on board. [/QUOTE]
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