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Substance Abuse
Good Grief...Can I Vent?
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<blockquote data-quote="TYLERFAN" data-source="post: 211163" data-attributes="member: 26"><p>Hi Family:</p><p> </p><p>I really need a good vent session. There are so many things going on and I am finding it hard to cope....Really hard<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/dont_know.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":dont_know:" title="dontknow :dont_know:" data-shortname=":dont_know:" /></p><p>difficult child continues to make life miserable and Grandmonster is helping her<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/devil.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":devil:" title="devil :devil:" data-shortname=":devil:" /></p><p>She has been non-compliant with our legal agreement for over a year and now tells ME that I am in violation because husband told the drug testing agency that he doesn't want to pay for drug testing for difficult child while she is pregnant......and that the order has been irrovocably violated by difficult child. Now, I'm not 100&#37; sure that this is correct. My attorney told us that the first time she violates the order, the order is invalid for her visitation rights. We have another attorney that husband hired looking into the matter.</p><p>difficult child has been making noises about going to court to get more visitation, she doesn't think it matters that she has had maybe only 3 drug tests in 13 months......<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/highvoltage.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":highvoltage:" title="shocked :highvoltage:" data-shortname=":highvoltage:" /></p><p>She continues to say she wants "J" back in 3 years, doesn't get that she was supposed to have followed the order in order to ask for return custody. I know her personality disorder combined with her disorganized thinking and impulsive nature inhibits her to some degree in understanding, but I am just not buying her total stupidity act. And as "witz" said in a previous post to me, I am Furious with her. Her total disregard for ANOTHER childs life as well as her son's.....and now thinking she can do a better job this time.....and her being in the same predicament as last time. WTH???????<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/hypnosis.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":hypnosis:" title="hypnosis :hypnosis:" data-shortname=":hypnosis:" /></p><p>husband wants nothing but full custody of "J", I am the one who is the Guardian and I don't know what I want. I am not sure that going into court to get custody just because difficult child is prego again is the right thing. New attrny told husband yesterday, they may want the siblings to be "together" and the court could ask us to take the new baby???? I never have heard of such a thing? I feel that maybe we can just appease difficult child forever and not have to do any more legal wrangling.....Probably won't happen though.</p><p>I don't know. I feel so conflicted. In my own selfish way, I feel like I am missing the freedom we used to have. I love "J" so much, but if he were to go back to his mom at 13 or 14, I might not be as adamant as I am today.....Does that make any sense, or am I a bad gramma?</p><p>I guess I just feel that this is the hardest job I've ever done....not sure I am totally confident about my ability and the results.....</p><p> </p><p>I'm sorry guys, I am rambling here. I just need to know if any of this makes sense or do I need to go to my shrink tomorrow?</p><p> </p><p>By the way, I Love my Job, Love my Husband, Love my "J" and life is darn good....I am very grateful and happy. I don't understand why I still have the feelings I wrote above.</p><p> </p><p>Any insights are appreciated.</p><p> </p><p>Blessings,</p><p>Melissa:coffee2:</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TYLERFAN, post: 211163, member: 26"] Hi Family: I really need a good vent session. There are so many things going on and I am finding it hard to cope....Really hard:dont_know: difficult child continues to make life miserable and Grandmonster is helping her:devil: She has been non-compliant with our legal agreement for over a year and now tells ME that I am in violation because husband told the drug testing agency that he doesn't want to pay for drug testing for difficult child while she is pregnant......and that the order has been irrovocably violated by difficult child. Now, I'm not 100% sure that this is correct. My attorney told us that the first time she violates the order, the order is invalid for her visitation rights. We have another attorney that husband hired looking into the matter. difficult child has been making noises about going to court to get more visitation, she doesn't think it matters that she has had maybe only 3 drug tests in 13 months......:highvoltage: She continues to say she wants "J" back in 3 years, doesn't get that she was supposed to have followed the order in order to ask for return custody. I know her personality disorder combined with her disorganized thinking and impulsive nature inhibits her to some degree in understanding, but I am just not buying her total stupidity act. And as "witz" said in a previous post to me, I am Furious with her. Her total disregard for ANOTHER childs life as well as her son's.....and now thinking she can do a better job this time.....and her being in the same predicament as last time. WTH???????:hypnosis: husband wants nothing but full custody of "J", I am the one who is the Guardian and I don't know what I want. I am not sure that going into court to get custody just because difficult child is prego again is the right thing. New attrny told husband yesterday, they may want the siblings to be "together" and the court could ask us to take the new baby???? I never have heard of such a thing? I feel that maybe we can just appease difficult child forever and not have to do any more legal wrangling.....Probably won't happen though. I don't know. I feel so conflicted. In my own selfish way, I feel like I am missing the freedom we used to have. I love "J" so much, but if he were to go back to his mom at 13 or 14, I might not be as adamant as I am today.....Does that make any sense, or am I a bad gramma? I guess I just feel that this is the hardest job I've ever done....not sure I am totally confident about my ability and the results..... I'm sorry guys, I am rambling here. I just need to know if any of this makes sense or do I need to go to my shrink tomorrow? By the way, I Love my Job, Love my Husband, Love my "J" and life is darn good....I am very grateful and happy. I don't understand why I still have the feelings I wrote above. Any insights are appreciated. Blessings, Melissa:coffee2: [/QUOTE]
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