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Substance Abuse
Good Grief...Can I Vent?
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 211171" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>Sorry, Melissa. GFGmoms have a way of turning the world upside down on a whim.........usually a whim that benefits them. It is SO frustrating and SO sad and SO destructive for the extended family. </p><p> </p><p>I think your husband is right to have a 2nd attorney review the agreement and the pattern of non-compliance. in my humble opinion the reason GFGmoms can and do cause such pain is because the "normal" adults in the situation keep trying to believe that the GFGmom has honest and sincere intentions. It's hard to slam and lock the door on your child knowing that there will never be the relationship that you had assumed would kick in at maturity. Melissa, there is NO maturity around the corner for GFGmom.</p><p> </p><p>Absolutely I think you need to talk to your professional to help sort through the specifics of your purgatory. Your CD family cares and supports you but we don't "know" all the players well enough to give any expert advice. </p><p> </p><p>Regarding the new sibling being raised with J...well, as a Guardian Ad Litem</p><p>I saw repeatedly that Childrens Services decided to "add a baby" (and sometimes another full grown child!) to the happy home that one child was enjoying. Around here it was not unusual for it to be "ugly". "IF you want to keep the baby THEN you MUST welcome the sibling...etc."</p><p> </p><p>I have a number of problems with that threat. The most obvious problem is that GFGmom's tend to have "the rabbit habit"...and just about as much</p><p>preplanning ability. One can become two which becomes three. One woman in this town literally had eleven children by different men and "the system" tried to block the adoption of two siblings that I was GAL for, to force the foster parents to add "at least one more". Yikes!</p><p> </p><p>by the way, a teenager boy would not do well being thrust into wacky lifestyles.</p><p>That is exactly how easy child/difficult child got "introduced" into booze and pot...GFGmoms boyfriend thought he was old enough because he was a teen!</p><p> </p><p>Sending many caring hugs. Wish I could send an answser. See your therapist AND very importantly stay connected to husband regarding the J issue. J NEEDS two parents who work as a team. Hugs. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 211171, member: 35"] Sorry, Melissa. GFGmoms have a way of turning the world upside down on a whim.........usually a whim that benefits them. It is SO frustrating and SO sad and SO destructive for the extended family. I think your husband is right to have a 2nd attorney review the agreement and the pattern of non-compliance. in my humble opinion the reason GFGmoms can and do cause such pain is because the "normal" adults in the situation keep trying to believe that the GFGmom has honest and sincere intentions. It's hard to slam and lock the door on your child knowing that there will never be the relationship that you had assumed would kick in at maturity. Melissa, there is NO maturity around the corner for GFGmom. Absolutely I think you need to talk to your professional to help sort through the specifics of your purgatory. Your CD family cares and supports you but we don't "know" all the players well enough to give any expert advice. Regarding the new sibling being raised with J...well, as a Guardian Ad Litem I saw repeatedly that Childrens Services decided to "add a baby" (and sometimes another full grown child!) to the happy home that one child was enjoying. Around here it was not unusual for it to be "ugly". "IF you want to keep the baby THEN you MUST welcome the sibling...etc." I have a number of problems with that threat. The most obvious problem is that GFGmom's tend to have "the rabbit habit"...and just about as much preplanning ability. One can become two which becomes three. One woman in this town literally had eleven children by different men and "the system" tried to block the adoption of two siblings that I was GAL for, to force the foster parents to add "at least one more". Yikes! by the way, a teenager boy would not do well being thrust into wacky lifestyles. That is exactly how easy child/difficult child got "introduced" into booze and pot...GFGmoms boyfriend thought he was old enough because he was a teen! Sending many caring hugs. Wish I could send an answser. See your therapist AND very importantly stay connected to husband regarding the J issue. J NEEDS two parents who work as a team. Hugs. DDD [/QUOTE]
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