Good morning everyone! I spent another day just doing very little as I am physically and emotionally drained.
I had a big weekend of Bible conference which was wonderful. My DS 19 came along, and behaved himself for the most part. Till the end, when for some strange reason, he needed to use my car to go buy cigarettes. Something didn't gel, so I refused, setting off his agression and surly behaviour. He barely spoke to me the whole way home. Yesterday, Monday, he was his least cooperative self. (Again this happens the day or two before his medications are due, is this a pattern?) So, eventually, I withdrew privileges to make my point. No power, no dinner, no talking to him as I get sick of arguing with him and I told him I wasn't driving him to work either, so he'd better ring a taxi. Which he did! He has no concept of cost, so even when told it would be $2.50 per km, it didn't register. I turned up his trousers, and did wake him up and let him have breakfast. He sent me a text later, I could feel the shock "Mum it cost $52 to get here! And it'll be the same back!!" Welcome to the world I think.
I picked him up since he had a doctor appointment. He was remorseful. He repeated, it cost $52. Yes, I do it every day for nothing? Why should I? "I dunno" he says.
I talked to him about, why does he think I should transport him around for nothing? I don't get $52 for each trip to Laidley. He couldn't answer that. I pointed out that I do it for love, for love of him and it would be nice to be appreciated once in a while. How could he show appreciation? By doing the tasks I ask of him cheerfully, and kindly, without argument. In life, your boss will ask tasks of you, and they have to be done cheerfully, even when the boss asks you to repeat them s he's not happy with it. You can't tell the boss, I've done it once, I'm not doing it again! I don't feel like it, etc.
Trouble is, when he digs in his heels and says no, I don't have much to retort with, so hitting him where it hurts, his pocket or the power to his precious DVDs and games is really all I have to bargain with. I don't know if I will get away with using the taxi thing again though,but it might be a good threat! He's unsure yet as to whether I'm driving him to work Friday or he's getting a taxi, I told him it depends on his behaviour.
His Employment services counsellor is just that, a very talented counsellor and on talking to her today, she feels he needs to sort out some of these emotional problems before getting a job, without too much information from me, she's worked him out. So, there is an appointment tomorrow and she reckons she's going to talk him into some D & A rehabilitation. I don't like her chances, but it would be a good idea as he has no education on drug and alcohol abuse, apart from the using part.
I do want him to succeed and be at least semi independent, but he's got a long ways to go yet.
anyways, I've rambled enough. I hope to do better with my tasks tomorrow, I'm still fighting that bug, bronchitis or something, barking and carrying on... I think it's slowing me down a bit.
Oh, guess what? I bought a cello on ebay so I might finally get to learn properly. It's a dream,..... I'm sure DD12 will learn before me or DD24 will steal it away from us both!
Have a great day...