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Parent Emeritus
Guilt - and getting over it.
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<blockquote data-quote="PatriotsGirl" data-source="post: 569889"><p>Welcome - we all very much understand where you are. My husband has also said on many occasions that he cannot live with difficult child and if I ever had her move back here, he would leave. It is awful to hear that. Like a stab in the heart and you feel it is not fair. You brought this person into the world - how could you let them fall? </p><p></p><p>Truth is, you have to. My husband was right and yours is, too. difficult child caused so much turmoil in our home it affected everyone - even our younger easy child. Our home was miserable and I never looked forward to coming home. Now it is peaceful and happy. I worry about difficult child all of the time, don't get me wrong. It hurts my mommy heart like nothing else. But she is the master of her destiny and no one can change anything but her. </p><p></p><p>You cannot save him. The more you save him, the more you pushing bottom down even further. And he has to hit bottom. It has to get so bad for them that THEY want change. And they have to want it much more than you. </p><p></p><p>(((HUGS))) you came to the right place for support...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="PatriotsGirl, post: 569889"] Welcome - we all very much understand where you are. My husband has also said on many occasions that he cannot live with difficult child and if I ever had her move back here, he would leave. It is awful to hear that. Like a stab in the heart and you feel it is not fair. You brought this person into the world - how could you let them fall? Truth is, you have to. My husband was right and yours is, too. difficult child caused so much turmoil in our home it affected everyone - even our younger easy child. Our home was miserable and I never looked forward to coming home. Now it is peaceful and happy. I worry about difficult child all of the time, don't get me wrong. It hurts my mommy heart like nothing else. But she is the master of her destiny and no one can change anything but her. You cannot save him. The more you save him, the more you pushing bottom down even further. And he has to hit bottom. It has to get so bad for them that THEY want change. And they have to want it much more than you. (((HUGS))) you came to the right place for support... [/QUOTE]
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Guilt - and getting over it.
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