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Have you ever *really* thrown your kid out?
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 369132" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Making your child leave is incredibly hard on your heart. It hurts like nothing I have ever experienced. In our case it was a safety issue for all of us. My husband would NEVER have agreed if I had left any wiggle room at all. It took him about 3 years to process it all. I was terribly hurt when about 18 months after Wiz left my husband told me he didn't even know why I kicked him out!!! husband came home after the deputies were there. They tried to get him to talk me into letting him stay and he knew that if I went to that point that there was no going back. He stood next to me in court as I read a letter to the judge detailing what had happened and the history and pleading for him to send Wiz to Residential Treatment Center (RTC). He even sat up with me when I couldn't breathe if I was laying down because the enormous bruise on my chest from where Wiz had head butted me and the bruises on my back from where he pushed me into the bar. </p><p></p><p>I knew, deep down, that if Wiz stayed we would both end up dead. I would have killed him before he could have hurt his sister again, and then probably killed myself because I couldn't live with what I had done. If he had killed me, or Jessie then he would have killed himself out of guilt - either right then or at some point in the next year or two. It was something I just could NOT allow to happen, but we were so far down that road with him that the ONLY way I could see to avoid it was to make him leave.</p><p></p><p>husband did get some help, and so did I. It has made a HUGE difference in our marriage. </p><p></p><p>Can you look at what your daughter is doing, breaking the rules etc..., and see how it is hurting her? Can your husband be brought to a point where he can also see this? To see that her actions don't just hurt the rest of the family, but they are also hurting HER? If you can see that it may be less difficult to make her leave. You are doing her NO favors by letting her live with you, and it is likely hurting your other children quite a bit. Not only do they have to live with the chaos, they also are learning that they can ignore the rules with little real consequences if they want to. It is such a hard thing to do, but it really is necessary to put the good of the family over the good of one child.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 369132, member: 1233"] Making your child leave is incredibly hard on your heart. It hurts like nothing I have ever experienced. In our case it was a safety issue for all of us. My husband would NEVER have agreed if I had left any wiggle room at all. It took him about 3 years to process it all. I was terribly hurt when about 18 months after Wiz left my husband told me he didn't even know why I kicked him out!!! husband came home after the deputies were there. They tried to get him to talk me into letting him stay and he knew that if I went to that point that there was no going back. He stood next to me in court as I read a letter to the judge detailing what had happened and the history and pleading for him to send Wiz to Residential Treatment Center (RTC). He even sat up with me when I couldn't breathe if I was laying down because the enormous bruise on my chest from where Wiz had head butted me and the bruises on my back from where he pushed me into the bar. I knew, deep down, that if Wiz stayed we would both end up dead. I would have killed him before he could have hurt his sister again, and then probably killed myself because I couldn't live with what I had done. If he had killed me, or Jessie then he would have killed himself out of guilt - either right then or at some point in the next year or two. It was something I just could NOT allow to happen, but we were so far down that road with him that the ONLY way I could see to avoid it was to make him leave. husband did get some help, and so did I. It has made a HUGE difference in our marriage. Can you look at what your daughter is doing, breaking the rules etc..., and see how it is hurting her? Can your husband be brought to a point where he can also see this? To see that her actions don't just hurt the rest of the family, but they are also hurting HER? If you can see that it may be less difficult to make her leave. You are doing her NO favors by letting her live with you, and it is likely hurting your other children quite a bit. Not only do they have to live with the chaos, they also are learning that they can ignore the rules with little real consequences if they want to. It is such a hard thing to do, but it really is necessary to put the good of the family over the good of one child. [/QUOTE]
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Have you ever *really* thrown your kid out?
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