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Substance Abuse
Heard from difficult child today...
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 508537"><p>Kathy - definitely not upset with you. I agree with you actually. What I am pleased about is he is the one trying to figure it out and that is a good step... at least he is thinking about what he is going to do rather than just giving up completely. And when I say pleased, it is not pleased as in jumping for joy pleased, it is pleased in that it is a postive step but we shall see pleased. If you know what I mean.</p><p></p><p>The outpatient program he wants to get into is not a substance abuse program really but more for mental health issues including personality disorders which I do think would be beneficial to him.... and which I believe also has a substance abuse component.... originally they would not consider him unless he did 30 days inpatient substance abuse so my hope is that they still wont take him without 30 days in patient or longer. I suspect they wil be on to him pretty quick, especially if they look at his medical file there.</p><p></p><p>He is definitely not coming home to our house... that we have made very clear and he knows that is an absolute because we will not put his sister through any more of his shenanigans.</p><p></p><p>I have also decided that if he does come back here (we will not pay for the plane ticket) and he wants us to pay for the sober house we will only do it on the condition that he is the outpatient program, signs all releases, and that we get confirmation he is in the program and staying in the program. If he stops treatment for any reason then we would stop paying rent. They will kick him out in a minute if he is using... and they will figure out that is what is happening. He knows that because it is exactly what happened before.</p><p></p><p>I agree for the substance abuse he would be best off in a 90 day program with a halfway house afterwards and I also think he is best off not coming back to the girlfriend. I also know though he will be more committed to a program if he figures it out and decides on it himself, rather than us dictating it. It is a fine line for us with him. I also think though that for the mental health/personality issues he needs more mental health treatment than he would get in most substance abuse programs and that is where the difficulty is for me. I think for him to stay clean anywhere he needs some serious help with his mental health issues, most probably a personailty disorder. That is probably best treated at this program he is talking about. If he can even get into it which he might not be able to.</p><p></p><p>And if he comes back here he runs a huge risk of landing up in jail. He knows that too... and the girlfriend is a part of that... and I have said my piece about that and so am not even going to bring it up with him.</p><p></p><p>Lets hope the program up here will tell him they wont consdier him without 30 days of treatment!!!</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 508537"] Kathy - definitely not upset with you. I agree with you actually. What I am pleased about is he is the one trying to figure it out and that is a good step... at least he is thinking about what he is going to do rather than just giving up completely. And when I say pleased, it is not pleased as in jumping for joy pleased, it is pleased in that it is a postive step but we shall see pleased. If you know what I mean. The outpatient program he wants to get into is not a substance abuse program really but more for mental health issues including personality disorders which I do think would be beneficial to him.... and which I believe also has a substance abuse component.... originally they would not consider him unless he did 30 days inpatient substance abuse so my hope is that they still wont take him without 30 days in patient or longer. I suspect they wil be on to him pretty quick, especially if they look at his medical file there. He is definitely not coming home to our house... that we have made very clear and he knows that is an absolute because we will not put his sister through any more of his shenanigans. I have also decided that if he does come back here (we will not pay for the plane ticket) and he wants us to pay for the sober house we will only do it on the condition that he is the outpatient program, signs all releases, and that we get confirmation he is in the program and staying in the program. If he stops treatment for any reason then we would stop paying rent. They will kick him out in a minute if he is using... and they will figure out that is what is happening. He knows that because it is exactly what happened before. I agree for the substance abuse he would be best off in a 90 day program with a halfway house afterwards and I also think he is best off not coming back to the girlfriend. I also know though he will be more committed to a program if he figures it out and decides on it himself, rather than us dictating it. It is a fine line for us with him. I also think though that for the mental health/personality issues he needs more mental health treatment than he would get in most substance abuse programs and that is where the difficulty is for me. I think for him to stay clean anywhere he needs some serious help with his mental health issues, most probably a personailty disorder. That is probably best treated at this program he is talking about. If he can even get into it which he might not be able to. And if he comes back here he runs a huge risk of landing up in jail. He knows that too... and the girlfriend is a part of that... and I have said my piece about that and so am not even going to bring it up with him. Lets hope the program up here will tell him they wont consdier him without 30 days of treatment!!! TL [/QUOTE]
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