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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 103729" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Kelly, </p><p></p><p>(Cleveland Rocks) & Welcome </p><p></p><p>Well I don't have any suggestions of what to have diagnosis or not diagnosis. I do think that Zoloft is a big bad drug. At 11 and 12 it made my son have suicidal thoughts. They tried it again at 15-16 and the same thing happened to him and myself. </p><p></p><p>Why did you stop seeing a psychologist or a psychiatrist? First before you get the illusion that this can be cured with a pill, or a magic wand or taping chicken livers to your naked elbows and dancing in the moonlight you need to come to the realization that this is a disability. It's not going to go away. It can be managed with therapy and sometimes medications or elimination diets. To think that there is a Fountain of Cure somewhere only will frustrate you to no end. Manageable? Yes. Curable? No. That was the first thing I had to come to terms with. </p><p></p><p>A lot of difficult child's are very bright and gifted scholastically. Their behaviors in a school setting snowball until it almost appears that the child is depressed from lack of understanding the material. Moreover it's a lack of self esteem they suffer from. Years of being the kid who constantly blurts stuff out, yells, has tantrums for seemingly no reason - more the case. </p><p></p><p>I had hoped too that my son would be a lawyer or a veterinarian. He now is living in a group home 3 hours from me, barely maintaining his GED classes, doing community service for crimes he should have known better to do, and has a huge fine and probation. I can't even look at his baby pictures anymore it's too painful. But he's alive, he's trying to get his GED, he's trying to get a job and learn how to support himself and he's not on drugs or alcohol. I missed entirely too much of a life I loved so wholeheartedly. </p><p></p><p>My best advice is to do what you can for today - shorter term goals with realistic outcomes will help you to not become so depressed. You may have an advantage home schooling if you can do it. </p><p></p><p> My son was on 64 medications in 11 years and combinations of the same. We put him in around 20 placements, and 5 or 6 psychiatric. hospitals. Therapists from Mental health came to our home, we had doctors, allergists, MRI's, brain scans, EEG's - you name it I've done it in the name of trying to help my son - my only son. </p><p></p><p>At 17 years old - I've now had to learn how to tough love, turn my back and attend therapy to learn how to be able to communicate with a child who can't seem to learn how "not" to do some of the simplest things and how "to" do things that most kids just do without being asked. </p><p></p><p>It's a long road - keep yourself healthy, get a good therapist your son can create a bond with for years to come - and take a lot of breaks from him. Don't worry about your parents - they're never going to get "it". Don't try to explain it. </p><p></p><p>Hugs</p><p>It gets better, then worse, then better, then worse, and then really bad, then somewhat better. And that's the truth. </p><p></p><p>Star</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 103729, member: 4964"] Kelly, (Cleveland Rocks) & Welcome Well I don't have any suggestions of what to have diagnosis or not diagnosis. I do think that Zoloft is a big bad drug. At 11 and 12 it made my son have suicidal thoughts. They tried it again at 15-16 and the same thing happened to him and myself. Why did you stop seeing a psychologist or a psychiatrist? First before you get the illusion that this can be cured with a pill, or a magic wand or taping chicken livers to your naked elbows and dancing in the moonlight you need to come to the realization that this is a disability. It's not going to go away. It can be managed with therapy and sometimes medications or elimination diets. To think that there is a Fountain of Cure somewhere only will frustrate you to no end. Manageable? Yes. Curable? No. That was the first thing I had to come to terms with. A lot of difficult child's are very bright and gifted scholastically. Their behaviors in a school setting snowball until it almost appears that the child is depressed from lack of understanding the material. Moreover it's a lack of self esteem they suffer from. Years of being the kid who constantly blurts stuff out, yells, has tantrums for seemingly no reason - more the case. I had hoped too that my son would be a lawyer or a veterinarian. He now is living in a group home 3 hours from me, barely maintaining his GED classes, doing community service for crimes he should have known better to do, and has a huge fine and probation. I can't even look at his baby pictures anymore it's too painful. But he's alive, he's trying to get his GED, he's trying to get a job and learn how to support himself and he's not on drugs or alcohol. I missed entirely too much of a life I loved so wholeheartedly. My best advice is to do what you can for today - shorter term goals with realistic outcomes will help you to not become so depressed. You may have an advantage home schooling if you can do it. My son was on 64 medications in 11 years and combinations of the same. We put him in around 20 placements, and 5 or 6 psychiatric. hospitals. Therapists from Mental health came to our home, we had doctors, allergists, MRI's, brain scans, EEG's - you name it I've done it in the name of trying to help my son - my only son. At 17 years old - I've now had to learn how to tough love, turn my back and attend therapy to learn how to be able to communicate with a child who can't seem to learn how "not" to do some of the simplest things and how "to" do things that most kids just do without being asked. It's a long road - keep yourself healthy, get a good therapist your son can create a bond with for years to come - and take a lot of breaks from him. Don't worry about your parents - they're never going to get "it". Don't try to explain it. Hugs It gets better, then worse, then better, then worse, and then really bad, then somewhat better. And that's the truth. Star [/QUOTE]
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