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Help me stay strong!!
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 567407" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Gosh TL, I am so sorry you're going through this. First of all, gentle hugs coming your way..... Pasa, Nancy and CJ have given you great advice, and geez, I know how hard it is. When our difficult child's are "out there" in our opinion, so vulnerable, so unsafe, so alone, it is just devastating to think of them in those terms, all our instincts want to protect, to help, to nurture, to bring home. BUT, he is making the choice to stay "out there" no one is nailing him to that spot. If he is hungry and cold, all he has to do is call you to get help. For whatever reason, he is not willing to do that. He may be someday, but not today. </p><p></p><p>I think what you are doing, what I'm doing, what many of us here are in the process of doing, is the most difficult, most painful thing we can do as parents. It is hard, it's really hard, but little by little, you can stop torturing yourself, you can detach just a little, just enough to get through tonight, tomorrow, the next day. I would limit my FB checking to every other day, or every 3 days and then wean yourself away. Give yourself some time in between to expand your own life without worrying about your difficult child so you strengthen that part of you.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there TL, you always do a wonderful job being a Mom, and this is so difficult.........but it does ease up, really.........HUGS..............</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 567407, member: 13542"] Gosh TL, I am so sorry you're going through this. First of all, gentle hugs coming your way..... Pasa, Nancy and CJ have given you great advice, and geez, I know how hard it is. When our difficult child's are "out there" in our opinion, so vulnerable, so unsafe, so alone, it is just devastating to think of them in those terms, all our instincts want to protect, to help, to nurture, to bring home. BUT, he is making the choice to stay "out there" no one is nailing him to that spot. If he is hungry and cold, all he has to do is call you to get help. For whatever reason, he is not willing to do that. He may be someday, but not today. I think what you are doing, what I'm doing, what many of us here are in the process of doing, is the most difficult, most painful thing we can do as parents. It is hard, it's really hard, but little by little, you can stop torturing yourself, you can detach just a little, just enough to get through tonight, tomorrow, the next day. I would limit my FB checking to every other day, or every 3 days and then wean yourself away. Give yourself some time in between to expand your own life without worrying about your difficult child so you strengthen that part of you. Hang in there TL, you always do a wonderful job being a Mom, and this is so difficult.........but it does ease up, really.........HUGS.............. [/QUOTE]
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