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He's Driving Me "Nvts"
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<blockquote data-quote="SearchingForRainbows" data-source="post: 120786" data-attributes="member: 3388"><p>Beth,</p><p></p><p>I'm so sorry you're going through this absolute HE77. I honestly think I</p><p>understand how you feel. In fact, in some ways, your situation is sort of like mine - We both have three kids, close together in age, the two oldest male difficult children with Aspergers and assorted other "fun" stuff. The difference being my youngest daughter is a easy child (However, don't make me define easy child this morning, lol), and yours is a difficult child. I have enough difficulties with two difficult children - I can only imagine how much harder life must be for you with three difficult children!!!</p><p></p><p>I wish I had some great advice for you instead of just a shoulder to lean on... Anyway, I agree with you that you have to make sure he is getting the appropriate dosages and types of medication before much progress can be made with his totally unacceptable behavior. From personal experience with difficult child 1, no amount of therapy helped at all until we found the right combo of medications. difficult child 1 definitely needed a mood stabilizer. For us it was a blessing!!!</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like your husband is being supportive or helpful right now. Also, from personal experience, until husband and I got on the same page, and husband spent more time with difficult child 1, difficult child 1's behavior only got worse. From what you wrote, it seems like your husband is still a bit fragile emotionally. However, it is unfair of him to be able to escape spending time with difficult child by claiming he is too tired. You're tired too!!! I think your husband needs to understand this. He needs to give you some "me" time.</p><p></p><p>I honestly wish I could help you. I know the pain you're going through. I still struggle with many of the same issues you do. All I know is that I had to get very assertive and let husband know how bad things for me really were. I used to be the "peace keeper" but after years of doing this, I found that all it did was wear me down and make me resent husband. Now, when I need more help from husband, I make my feelings known. </p><p></p><p>I also have to do all of the research when it comes to finding help for difficult children. This is a full time job in itself. It is difficult and frustrating on the best of days. And, it is just plain discouraging on the worst of days...</p><p></p><p>All I know, is that your a great <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/warrior.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":warrior:" title="warrior :warrior:" data-shortname=":warrior:" />mom. Try to get some time to yourself this weekend. Try to get husband to watch the kids. You need a break!!!</p><p></p><p>Sending lots of cyber hugs...WFEN</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SearchingForRainbows, post: 120786, member: 3388"] Beth, I'm so sorry you're going through this absolute HE77. I honestly think I understand how you feel. In fact, in some ways, your situation is sort of like mine - We both have three kids, close together in age, the two oldest male difficult children with Aspergers and assorted other "fun" stuff. The difference being my youngest daughter is a easy child (However, don't make me define easy child this morning, lol), and yours is a difficult child. I have enough difficulties with two difficult children - I can only imagine how much harder life must be for you with three difficult children!!! I wish I had some great advice for you instead of just a shoulder to lean on... Anyway, I agree with you that you have to make sure he is getting the appropriate dosages and types of medication before much progress can be made with his totally unacceptable behavior. From personal experience with difficult child 1, no amount of therapy helped at all until we found the right combo of medications. difficult child 1 definitely needed a mood stabilizer. For us it was a blessing!!! Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like your husband is being supportive or helpful right now. Also, from personal experience, until husband and I got on the same page, and husband spent more time with difficult child 1, difficult child 1's behavior only got worse. From what you wrote, it seems like your husband is still a bit fragile emotionally. However, it is unfair of him to be able to escape spending time with difficult child by claiming he is too tired. You're tired too!!! I think your husband needs to understand this. He needs to give you some "me" time. I honestly wish I could help you. I know the pain you're going through. I still struggle with many of the same issues you do. All I know is that I had to get very assertive and let husband know how bad things for me really were. I used to be the "peace keeper" but after years of doing this, I found that all it did was wear me down and make me resent husband. Now, when I need more help from husband, I make my feelings known. I also have to do all of the research when it comes to finding help for difficult children. This is a full time job in itself. It is difficult and frustrating on the best of days. And, it is just plain discouraging on the worst of days... All I know, is that your a great :warrior:mom. Try to get some time to yourself this weekend. Try to get husband to watch the kids. You need a break!!! Sending lots of cyber hugs...WFEN [/QUOTE]
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