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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 199846" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Well, well, well....if it isn't Ms. Fancy litter receptacle......<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/tongue.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":tongue:" title="tongue :tongue:" data-shortname=":tongue:" /> Glad to see you !!!!! </p><p> </p><p>This is one of the things that I struggle with too K. Because....in a world where I have had to EXPLAIN to everyone or COULD explain to everyone that yes, he IS an "adult" (legally) there ARE some things about him that need to be explained, and I feel if I DO NOT explain them - he will get steamrolled or overlooked. Misunderstood is what I try to convey - because I feel unless there is someone (me) telling the world about my unique son - his handicapp is pushed by the wayside and then he's treated like everyone else. </p><p> </p><p>In a perfect world he WOULD be treated like everyone else - but since he didn't GET all the equipment that EVERYONE else gets - there SHOULD be someone there to help him, support him or manage things for him. </p><p> </p><p>Currently I'm in the park with others allowing my not-so-average son to find things out for himself. And again it goes back to - Well if he WERE like everyone else and figured it out - then okay - but when you start life short - WHY can't I continue to step in and help? To this day no one has come up with a better reason than "IF he doesn't do it now on his own he never will." and while I agree to some degree, IF he were normal....I still find my doubt in the park with - "BUT if he can not do this without assistance at birth, at 5, at 10, at 15, at 18 - HOW in the world is it going to be different for him in the future?" Some things are just missing and they aren't going to just MAGICALLY appear by me MAGICALLY disappearing. </p><p> </p><p>I hate the tough love concept for my son, and for me...and for all of us. But on the flip side of that coin - if he's never going to get it- WILL all the hard knocks make a difference? So far for us - not-so-much. </p><p> </p><p>Hope you find a place you are comfortable with regarding all of this. Hugs to you. </p><p> </p><p>Star</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 199846, member: 4964"] Well, well, well....if it isn't Ms. Fancy litter receptacle......:raspberry-tounge: Glad to see you !!!!! This is one of the things that I struggle with too K. Because....in a world where I have had to EXPLAIN to everyone or COULD explain to everyone that yes, he IS an "adult" (legally) there ARE some things about him that need to be explained, and I feel if I DO NOT explain them - he will get steamrolled or overlooked. Misunderstood is what I try to convey - because I feel unless there is someone (me) telling the world about my unique son - his handicapp is pushed by the wayside and then he's treated like everyone else. In a perfect world he WOULD be treated like everyone else - but since he didn't GET all the equipment that EVERYONE else gets - there SHOULD be someone there to help him, support him or manage things for him. Currently I'm in the park with others allowing my not-so-average son to find things out for himself. And again it goes back to - Well if he WERE like everyone else and figured it out - then okay - but when you start life short - WHY can't I continue to step in and help? To this day no one has come up with a better reason than "IF he doesn't do it now on his own he never will." and while I agree to some degree, IF he were normal....I still find my doubt in the park with - "BUT if he can not do this without assistance at birth, at 5, at 10, at 15, at 18 - HOW in the world is it going to be different for him in the future?" Some things are just missing and they aren't going to just MAGICALLY appear by me MAGICALLY disappearing. I hate the tough love concept for my son, and for me...and for all of us. But on the flip side of that coin - if he's never going to get it- WILL all the hard knocks make a difference? So far for us - not-so-much. Hope you find a place you are comfortable with regarding all of this. Hugs to you. Star [/QUOTE]
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