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Honeymoon's Over I Guess
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<blockquote data-quote="TeDo" data-source="post: 385206"><p>SW, you're right. He needs to have some control and I totally admit I didn't phrase it correctly. I will try your approach next time, I know there will be a next time.</p><p> </p><p>Marg, I have questioned his diagnosis a lot lately. I HAVE considered Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) and also Asperger's. I will be asking for further diagnostics to determine what might REALLY might be going on. I wish the neuropsychologist we had done would have been more help. Maybe I need to find someone else to do another one. I do allow him to "redeem" himself and earn free time back after he has calmed down. All he has to do is complete whatever task caused the meltdown in the first place without any further issues and serve a portion of grounding without complaining. So far this has worked. He can be very reasonable when he's calm.</p><p> </p><p>Jena, you are right about simply not dealing with him and using that time to focus on easy child. I really feel bad for him much of the time. That is something I really need to work on because ANY interaction with difficult child during these tantrums is totally counterproductive. I don't know why I even bother.</p><p> </p><p>Mitchy, I don't mind grounding him. The problem is that I know that when he calms down, he feels remorse. by saying that I "could" ground him was an attempt to tell him what the consequences would be if he continued the behavior. </p><p> </p><p>Thanks all of you for your advice. I always learn new strategies for dealing with these behaviors from this board. What a Godsend!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TeDo, post: 385206"] SW, you're right. He needs to have some control and I totally admit I didn't phrase it correctly. I will try your approach next time, I know there will be a next time. Marg, I have questioned his diagnosis a lot lately. I HAVE considered Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) and also Asperger's. I will be asking for further diagnostics to determine what might REALLY might be going on. I wish the neuropsychologist we had done would have been more help. Maybe I need to find someone else to do another one. I do allow him to "redeem" himself and earn free time back after he has calmed down. All he has to do is complete whatever task caused the meltdown in the first place without any further issues and serve a portion of grounding without complaining. So far this has worked. He can be very reasonable when he's calm. Jena, you are right about simply not dealing with him and using that time to focus on easy child. I really feel bad for him much of the time. That is something I really need to work on because ANY interaction with difficult child during these tantrums is totally counterproductive. I don't know why I even bother. Mitchy, I don't mind grounding him. The problem is that I know that when he calms down, he feels remorse. by saying that I "could" ground him was an attempt to tell him what the consequences would be if he continued the behavior. Thanks all of you for your advice. I always learn new strategies for dealing with these behaviors from this board. What a Godsend!! [/QUOTE]
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