Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
How do I let these things happen?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 172689" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Heather</p><p> </p><p>I know you have easy child's girlfriend's welfare at heart, but you're going to have to set up some bounderies with this woman. Really. Before she sends you over the edge and causes you do say or do something that would cause much worse reprocussions for the girlfriend than simply not inviting the Mom over and such. And it will happen because this type of hanging on behavior gets old fast even if you have the patience of Job.</p><p> </p><p>I'm not a touchy feely sort of person. Someone walking up and hugging me is taking their life into their own hands. I've been known to hit first, explain later. Ok, so I've learned to control that a bit over the years, but if you are dumb enough to do it enough, it's eventually gonna happen. I have no trouble hugging and being outwardly affectionate with my kids. Period. A few extremely close friend of theirs, whom I pretty much consider "my" kids too can also hug me without it bothering me. husband has learned to ask first. lol</p><p> </p><p>You can start off by telling her that hugging and touching are very painful for you at this time. That opens the subject matter. Then you can go on to tell her that you just aren't that type of person anyway, and how people who do that annoy the living daylights out of you. Or something similar that gets the point across in a more general way.</p><p> </p><p>As for the party, tell her the simple truth. No "real" party per se as you can't afford it. Then no matter what her "plans" are, stick to your original plan for the birthday. If she brings over extra stuff, fine and dandy. You told her. You can't do more than that. But don't over extend or over do just because of her.</p><p> </p><p>You would be upfront and honest with a best friend. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/devil2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":devil2:" title="devil2 :devil2:" data-shortname=":devil2:" /></p><p> </p><p>This way if you continue to feel you must tolerate this woman to avoid girlfriend having the fallout, you'll not start making plans to murder her within 30 days. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/tongue.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":tongue:" title="tongue :tongue:" data-shortname=":tongue:" /></p><p> </p><p>Heather, your Mom is right. It's because you're such a nice person this woman is getting away with invading your personal space. Someone else would've already told her to back off. So she's going to take advantage if you let her.</p><p> </p><p>I don't usually like passive agressive behavior........but on some people it works wonders. If you get my drift.</p><p> </p><p>(((hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 172689, member: 84"] Heather I know you have easy child's girlfriend's welfare at heart, but you're going to have to set up some bounderies with this woman. Really. Before she sends you over the edge and causes you do say or do something that would cause much worse reprocussions for the girlfriend than simply not inviting the Mom over and such. And it will happen because this type of hanging on behavior gets old fast even if you have the patience of Job. I'm not a touchy feely sort of person. Someone walking up and hugging me is taking their life into their own hands. I've been known to hit first, explain later. Ok, so I've learned to control that a bit over the years, but if you are dumb enough to do it enough, it's eventually gonna happen. I have no trouble hugging and being outwardly affectionate with my kids. Period. A few extremely close friend of theirs, whom I pretty much consider "my" kids too can also hug me without it bothering me. husband has learned to ask first. lol You can start off by telling her that hugging and touching are very painful for you at this time. That opens the subject matter. Then you can go on to tell her that you just aren't that type of person anyway, and how people who do that annoy the living daylights out of you. Or something similar that gets the point across in a more general way. As for the party, tell her the simple truth. No "real" party per se as you can't afford it. Then no matter what her "plans" are, stick to your original plan for the birthday. If she brings over extra stuff, fine and dandy. You told her. You can't do more than that. But don't over extend or over do just because of her. You would be upfront and honest with a best friend. :devil2: This way if you continue to feel you must tolerate this woman to avoid girlfriend having the fallout, you'll not start making plans to murder her within 30 days. :raspberry-tounge: Heather, your Mom is right. It's because you're such a nice person this woman is getting away with invading your personal space. Someone else would've already told her to back off. So she's going to take advantage if you let her. I don't usually like passive agressive behavior........but on some people it works wonders. If you get my drift. (((hugs))) [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
How do I let these things happen?
Top