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<blockquote data-quote="trinityroyal" data-source="post: 490668" data-attributes="member: 3907"><p>Mof5, the others have offered some terrific advice, and said it far more eloquently than I could have.</p><p></p><p>I will just add something I learned from experience:</p><p>As the marriage counsellor who was seeing me (but not my ex-H) said during my first appointment, "You realize that if you're the only one participating in this, then the chances for your marriage surviving are not high. What you're really doing is divorce preparation."</p><p></p><p>That statement gave me the clarity to see the situation for what it was. And she was right. The marriage ended 8 months afterward. Whether you need to stay or go, you must focus on your own needs, and rebuilding a better you. That will allow you to thrive either in your marriage or out of it, whichever is best for you and your kiddoes.</p><p></p><p>And congratulations on your new job! I wish you all the best with it, and what a wonderful way to start the new year.</p><p></p><p>Trinity</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="trinityroyal, post: 490668, member: 3907"] Mof5, the others have offered some terrific advice, and said it far more eloquently than I could have. I will just add something I learned from experience: As the marriage counsellor who was seeing me (but not my ex-H) said during my first appointment, "You realize that if you're the only one participating in this, then the chances for your marriage surviving are not high. What you're really doing is divorce preparation." That statement gave me the clarity to see the situation for what it was. And she was right. The marriage ended 8 months afterward. Whether you need to stay or go, you must focus on your own needs, and rebuilding a better you. That will allow you to thrive either in your marriage or out of it, whichever is best for you and your kiddoes. And congratulations on your new job! I wish you all the best with it, and what a wonderful way to start the new year. Trinity [/QUOTE]
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