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<blockquote data-quote="Marcie Mac" data-source="post: 112618" data-attributes="member: 47"><p>I don't quite understand, and its difficult, your right, without knowing all the years of past history.</p><p></p><p>I seem to sense a little bit of animosity between you, his father and his stepmother. It always seems to be difficult enough to deal with X's and new spouces, and its definately difficult when no one is on the same page. If you don't approve of the wife, his dad, how they live, where they live, their sleeping arrangements, etc and think any help offered is only to make them look good (one wonders to who), then there will never be any meeting of the minds. </p><p></p><p>I still don't see it as them giving him "everything" The only thing I can see is that he now has a contact - he can use it or not use it - its something - its a start. In all reality, 30 days of forced sobriety means squat - most people do the two steps forward, one backward, more than a few times, while in recovery. </p><p></p><p>I don't care where you live, how upstanding of a community you live in, drugs are everywhere and if you want them, they can be found, rather easily. Short of locking him in his room, and making like his shadow, how can you save him? And what happens when he swears he will give you a full committment and then falls down as he probably will. You can have all the money and contacts and resources till the end of time, but unless your son has the actual intent,then, well, those resources are wasted.</p><p></p><p>Its not easy, believe me, my difficult child is a year older than yours and have the been there done that Tshirt. </p><p></p><p>Marcie</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marcie Mac, post: 112618, member: 47"] I don't quite understand, and its difficult, your right, without knowing all the years of past history. I seem to sense a little bit of animosity between you, his father and his stepmother. It always seems to be difficult enough to deal with X's and new spouces, and its definately difficult when no one is on the same page. If you don't approve of the wife, his dad, how they live, where they live, their sleeping arrangements, etc and think any help offered is only to make them look good (one wonders to who), then there will never be any meeting of the minds. I still don't see it as them giving him "everything" The only thing I can see is that he now has a contact - he can use it or not use it - its something - its a start. In all reality, 30 days of forced sobriety means squat - most people do the two steps forward, one backward, more than a few times, while in recovery. I don't care where you live, how upstanding of a community you live in, drugs are everywhere and if you want them, they can be found, rather easily. Short of locking him in his room, and making like his shadow, how can you save him? And what happens when he swears he will give you a full committment and then falls down as he probably will. You can have all the money and contacts and resources till the end of time, but unless your son has the actual intent,then, well, those resources are wasted. Its not easy, believe me, my difficult child is a year older than yours and have the been there done that Tshirt. Marcie [/QUOTE]
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