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Parent Emeritus
how to deal with other family members that enable
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<blockquote data-quote="PonyGirl" data-source="post: 112775" data-attributes="member: 187"><p>Good morning, Jmama, just want to say, I feel your pain! This situation is in the foggy area between "enabling" and "helping".</p><p></p><p>In my mind, "enabling" has the more negative feeling. If someone tries to shield difficult child from actual consequences; lie for him to get him out of trouble, or pay fines for him to avoid jail, that's enabling.</p><p></p><p>Helping is the more positive action; supporting recovery and meeting attendance, giving a 'safe' place to live, arranging a foot-in-the-door to possible employment, that does feel more like helping than enabling.</p><p></p><p>I know your struggle. I understand your anger. It doesn't seem fair that difficult child's dad & step-mom are the ones on the white horse right now! And that they don't communicate with you at all, that burns.</p><p></p><p>Hope your days goes better today. I will be thinking of you.</p><p></p><p>Peace</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="PonyGirl, post: 112775, member: 187"] Good morning, Jmama, just want to say, I feel your pain! This situation is in the foggy area between "enabling" and "helping". In my mind, "enabling" has the more negative feeling. If someone tries to shield difficult child from actual consequences; lie for him to get him out of trouble, or pay fines for him to avoid jail, that's enabling. Helping is the more positive action; supporting recovery and meeting attendance, giving a 'safe' place to live, arranging a foot-in-the-door to possible employment, that does feel more like helping than enabling. I know your struggle. I understand your anger. It doesn't seem fair that difficult child's dad & step-mom are the ones on the white horse right now! And that they don't communicate with you at all, that burns. Hope your days goes better today. I will be thinking of you. Peace [/QUOTE]
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