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How to get difficult child to school!!!!????
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 479508" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>Witnessing a dog get run over can be bothersome for a long time even if it was not his pet. My difficult child's 10 month old dog was hit last Spring and it was a few months before he could get the image from haunting him. Maybe passing by the location sets off memories for your difficult child?</p><p></p><p>I had problems with both my kids for two different reasons to get to school.</p><p></p><p>1st was Diva - I so wish I had this site for her and knew enough to follow the steps that I did for difficult child. Any way, she refused to go in 5th grade. I told her that she would have to call the school and tell them why she would be missing the day. She did not want her teacher to know what she was going through (though he did know because I shared with the school without her knowledge) so she would rather get herself to school than make that call. I have always told my kids that if I didn't think they should miss school than it was their responsibility to let the school know why they would not be showing up that day.</p><p></p><p>2nd was difficult child - He was suffering from intense anxiety. Until he was hospitalized, he really could not get to school physically. I went with him and sat by his side (we had no idea what was happening - he was falling apart) and even so, he could not make it through a day. He also could not make a trip to a store for the sole purpose of getting a Lego set for himself. After he was hospitalized and learned coping skills, he refused to go to school because his anxiety was so high. He was so deep into the anxiety that even the medications were not yet enough as he learned that his coping skills could get him through. He was then diagnosed a short term medication that took the edge off and helped him feel more relaxed. It also caused disinhibination where he became disrespectful of authority figures but with a fantastic school staff (small private school), I made the decision to keep him on it to help in the academics part of schooling. I could not have made it through that year without the awesome school staff.</p><p></p><p>I think your difficult child is a bit young to make that call to the school but you can ask him what he wants you to say to the school. You can ask him how you should reply if the school asks certain questions. Let him know that the school will want you to take him to a doctor if he tells them he is sick.</p><p></p><p>I was a little unclear about your signature. You state the oldest has anxiety? Is he your oldest? If not, has he ever been tested for anxiety? With anxiety, there is not necessarily a "cause" - it can and is often just a "feeling" for no reason. The "What If" syndrome. "What if I see another dog being run over?", "What if the kids won't let me play?", "What if I don't understand the teacher?", "What is going to happen today?"</p><p></p><p>After you mentioned witnessing the accident, my thoughts went straight to anxiety.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 479508, member: 5096"] Witnessing a dog get run over can be bothersome for a long time even if it was not his pet. My difficult child's 10 month old dog was hit last Spring and it was a few months before he could get the image from haunting him. Maybe passing by the location sets off memories for your difficult child? I had problems with both my kids for two different reasons to get to school. 1st was Diva - I so wish I had this site for her and knew enough to follow the steps that I did for difficult child. Any way, she refused to go in 5th grade. I told her that she would have to call the school and tell them why she would be missing the day. She did not want her teacher to know what she was going through (though he did know because I shared with the school without her knowledge) so she would rather get herself to school than make that call. I have always told my kids that if I didn't think they should miss school than it was their responsibility to let the school know why they would not be showing up that day. 2nd was difficult child - He was suffering from intense anxiety. Until he was hospitalized, he really could not get to school physically. I went with him and sat by his side (we had no idea what was happening - he was falling apart) and even so, he could not make it through a day. He also could not make a trip to a store for the sole purpose of getting a Lego set for himself. After he was hospitalized and learned coping skills, he refused to go to school because his anxiety was so high. He was so deep into the anxiety that even the medications were not yet enough as he learned that his coping skills could get him through. He was then diagnosed a short term medication that took the edge off and helped him feel more relaxed. It also caused disinhibination where he became disrespectful of authority figures but with a fantastic school staff (small private school), I made the decision to keep him on it to help in the academics part of schooling. I could not have made it through that year without the awesome school staff. I think your difficult child is a bit young to make that call to the school but you can ask him what he wants you to say to the school. You can ask him how you should reply if the school asks certain questions. Let him know that the school will want you to take him to a doctor if he tells them he is sick. I was a little unclear about your signature. You state the oldest has anxiety? Is he your oldest? If not, has he ever been tested for anxiety? With anxiety, there is not necessarily a "cause" - it can and is often just a "feeling" for no reason. The "What If" syndrome. "What if I see another dog being run over?", "What if the kids won't let me play?", "What if I don't understand the teacher?", "What is going to happen today?" After you mentioned witnessing the accident, my thoughts went straight to anxiety. [/QUOTE]
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