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<blockquote data-quote="troubled" data-source="post: 423502"><p>Hey, I am not so strong. For years, I had to put on a front even when I was crumbling to pieces inside. If someone keeps punching you in the stomach, after awhile your stomach toughens up so you can take the punches. That's what happened to me. I had to survive and I took all the blame for everything difficult child said and did to others because I divorced her father and it was all on me. difficult child chased away any friends I might have and I had no social life at all other than seeing family on holidays and birthdays.</p><p></p><p>No one will say you are weak because you feel frustration or want to cry. You are human. I go on with life taking care of me as best I can but you won't see me smiling much. I have only one true friend and I don't talk about difficult child to strangers because I'd rather not feel defensive or embarrassed or ashamed over difficult children actions and problems. I hate that I am even related to her right now. Shes the only person in my family who has been in jail. I was mortified and shocked despite warning her she would eventually end up there and it didn't even take 2 months. The ONLY reason she's even calling me or relatives for help is because her boyfriend's parents couldn't care less what happens to her and he is under his parents control because they are his legal guardians and have control of his Soc Sec Disabilty money and he lives with them. It's partly his fault she is in jail right now, too, but I believe she doesn't see that part of it. All she is used to doing is blaming others for the consequences of her own decisions, one of which was to "do whatever she wants" and get evicted from my home and unwelcome at anyone elses', including the women's shelter she was last at. Will she ever own up to her problems being her own fault? Probably not. But at least, now that she is over 18 and out of my home, no one can blame me anymore. Small consolation, I know, but I'll take it. I have nothing else.</p><p></p><p>Don't let it get you down. Have your "moments" but yes, carry on. When it comes to difficult child = "It's not my fault, I didn't cause it and I can't fix it." That's my new mantra and I wonder where I heard that? <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="troubled, post: 423502"] Hey, I am not so strong. For years, I had to put on a front even when I was crumbling to pieces inside. If someone keeps punching you in the stomach, after awhile your stomach toughens up so you can take the punches. That's what happened to me. I had to survive and I took all the blame for everything difficult child said and did to others because I divorced her father and it was all on me. difficult child chased away any friends I might have and I had no social life at all other than seeing family on holidays and birthdays. No one will say you are weak because you feel frustration or want to cry. You are human. I go on with life taking care of me as best I can but you won't see me smiling much. I have only one true friend and I don't talk about difficult child to strangers because I'd rather not feel defensive or embarrassed or ashamed over difficult children actions and problems. I hate that I am even related to her right now. Shes the only person in my family who has been in jail. I was mortified and shocked despite warning her she would eventually end up there and it didn't even take 2 months. The ONLY reason she's even calling me or relatives for help is because her boyfriend's parents couldn't care less what happens to her and he is under his parents control because they are his legal guardians and have control of his Soc Sec Disabilty money and he lives with them. It's partly his fault she is in jail right now, too, but I believe she doesn't see that part of it. All she is used to doing is blaming others for the consequences of her own decisions, one of which was to "do whatever she wants" and get evicted from my home and unwelcome at anyone elses', including the women's shelter she was last at. Will she ever own up to her problems being her own fault? Probably not. But at least, now that she is over 18 and out of my home, no one can blame me anymore. Small consolation, I know, but I'll take it. I have nothing else. Don't let it get you down. Have your "moments" but yes, carry on. When it comes to difficult child = "It's not my fault, I didn't cause it and I can't fix it." That's my new mantra and I wonder where I heard that? :) [/QUOTE]
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