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Hurricane togetherness~~with difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 195947" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>Sounds more like he's pretty self-willed. A good thing when choices have to be made and you're wise enough to understand that "no" can be the best move. A horrible thing when the idea is to do what you want when you want.</p><p> </p><p>As to the drums, there's a very simple solution. He loses them. He's right, he can do what he wants. However, that doesn't mean he doesn't have to suffer the consequences of what he does. Most kids learn this at a very young age. Some take a lot longer -- ADHD kids seem to "get it" in their 20s or even 30s. So, where possible let natural consequences take their course -- you can't follow the rule of no drums before 9:30 am, the drums are taken away (maybe you could have a neighbor call the police to complain -- that might get the message across much better than you saying a word). You want to bother the household by headbanging or making noises (unless it is truly unavoidable because it is a stimulant or a tic)? Don't be surprised when you no longer have a cushion behind your head or back. You hurt the dogs? The dogs bite you.</p><p> </p><p>No question that part of it is the obnoxiousness of his age. Young teens are awful human beings. Actually, I think calling them humans is beng overly kind. When you add ADHD, ODD and whatever else into the mix, there is little doubt they are sub-human for a few years. I'm sorry.</p><p> </p><p>HUGS</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 195947, member: 3626"] Sounds more like he's pretty self-willed. A good thing when choices have to be made and you're wise enough to understand that "no" can be the best move. A horrible thing when the idea is to do what you want when you want. As to the drums, there's a very simple solution. He loses them. He's right, he can do what he wants. However, that doesn't mean he doesn't have to suffer the consequences of what he does. Most kids learn this at a very young age. Some take a lot longer -- ADHD kids seem to "get it" in their 20s or even 30s. So, where possible let natural consequences take their course -- you can't follow the rule of no drums before 9:30 am, the drums are taken away (maybe you could have a neighbor call the police to complain -- that might get the message across much better than you saying a word). You want to bother the household by headbanging or making noises (unless it is truly unavoidable because it is a stimulant or a tic)? Don't be surprised when you no longer have a cushion behind your head or back. You hurt the dogs? The dogs bite you. No question that part of it is the obnoxiousness of his age. Young teens are awful human beings. Actually, I think calling them humans is beng overly kind. When you add ADHD, ODD and whatever else into the mix, there is little doubt they are sub-human for a few years. I'm sorry. HUGS [/QUOTE]
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Hurricane togetherness~~with difficult child
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