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Hurts so much
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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 765245" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Addition to above reply, which I was trying to edit, but took too long………</p><p></p><p>How many years spent, how many tears shed, do we realize that sacrificing ourselves will not change our adult children’s choices?</p><p>Sorry, I’m writing about stepping back from emotions and being pretty dramatic at the same time. </p><p>But truly….bodes the question…..</p><p>How do we help someone who will not help themselves?</p><p>The last encounter with my daughter- she went through rehab- made it to sober living- all the while spouting off 12 step- isms and Bible verses. I broke my rule and allowed her to stay a few days at my home. Only to find out she had hooked up with a guy at rehab (against the rules) they both ditched their court ordered programs and ran off together. She threw away her sobriety, her kids, her family, for a guy she barely knew. A month later- he’s back in jail, and she is on the run.</p><p>I have left sad on the floor and I’m just mad now.</p><p> But that’s emotion talking.</p><p>I’m going to be 65. How many more years do I need to stress over my two? I have no control over what they do with their lives. </p><p>I’m not writing them off. I’m writing myself out of their play. I don’t like the genre, can’t change the script, can’t trust what they tell me, the list goes on. </p><p>Do you remember the old daytime soap operas? There is one that stands out in my mind as I’m writing this.</p><p>“One Life to Live.”</p><p>That’s all we have. </p><p>My husband passed after bouts of illness during the rise of my twos addiction and downhill consequences. </p><p>You would think that seeing their dad ill and hospitalized off and on for three years would have been a wake up call. It wasn’t. You would think that his passing would have moved them to do better. It didn’t. </p><p>This month it’s been eight years.</p><p>One life to live is all we have. </p><p>I’m going to keep working my hardest to live my life as best as I can. </p><p>I hope you do too, and everyone else following along.</p><p> (((Hugs)))</p><p>New Leaf</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 765245, member: 19522"] Addition to above reply, which I was trying to edit, but took too long……… How many years spent, how many tears shed, do we realize that sacrificing ourselves will not change our adult children’s choices? Sorry, I’m writing about stepping back from emotions and being pretty dramatic at the same time. But truly….bodes the question….. How do we help someone who will not help themselves? The last encounter with my daughter- she went through rehab- made it to sober living- all the while spouting off 12 step- isms and Bible verses. I broke my rule and allowed her to stay a few days at my home. Only to find out she had hooked up with a guy at rehab (against the rules) they both ditched their court ordered programs and ran off together. She threw away her sobriety, her kids, her family, for a guy she barely knew. A month later- he’s back in jail, and she is on the run. I have left sad on the floor and I’m just mad now. But that’s emotion talking. I’m going to be 65. How many more years do I need to stress over my two? I have no control over what they do with their lives. I’m not writing them off. I’m writing myself out of their play. I don’t like the genre, can’t change the script, can’t trust what they tell me, the list goes on. Do you remember the old daytime soap operas? There is one that stands out in my mind as I’m writing this. “One Life to Live.” That’s all we have. My husband passed after bouts of illness during the rise of my twos addiction and downhill consequences. You would think that seeing their dad ill and hospitalized off and on for three years would have been a wake up call. It wasn’t. You would think that his passing would have moved them to do better. It didn’t. This month it’s been eight years. One life to live is all we have. I’m going to keep working my hardest to live my life as best as I can. I hope you do too, and everyone else following along. (((Hugs))) New Leaf [/QUOTE]
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