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I am at a loss on what to do, if anything.
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 561319" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>H&R, that's a lot for a mother's tender heart to take in. I understand all your concerns about your daughter. What jumps out at me is your sorrow, your recognition of what her limitations really are and how much they will impact her life. I think, from my own experience, as mom's we face those limits incrementally as we can accept them. Each step has grief because not only do our difficult child's have to give up certain expectations they have about their lives, we have to give up some of our parental expectations about what we would like for them too. And, it's the unknown, we aren't sure of how it will all turn out. We're uncertain and therefore, it's out of our control. We just don't know. All the ways we feel safe are threatened with what we don't know and what we're beginning to come to grips with is now becoming real.</p><p></p><p>Jo, I thought I remembered you speaking about you having a therapist. Perhaps it might be a good idea for you to see this person to move through your feelings about your difficult child's future and your fears and concerns. Once you can grieve and express what you're feeling, perhaps then you and your difficult child can talk about your fears which may allow her to see the realities so she can realize for herself exactly what she is dealing with and what she may have to do to stay healthy. It seems that the best way to handle this would be in a small step by small step fashion so everyone can grasp the realities and come to grips with it and make whatever changes will seem necessary. </p><p></p><p>It's hard being a mother of a child who has "issues" ..... we have our own learning curve and healing and accepting process too. It makes it more difficult when you feel alone, that's a bad feeling, I know that one too. But, you have us, we really get it, so keep venting and expressing. We're sending our prayers and hugs for you and we're listening..............we're here..............and if it feels right, talk to your therapist............take care of you too.................HUGS..........</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 561319, member: 13542"] H&R, that's a lot for a mother's tender heart to take in. I understand all your concerns about your daughter. What jumps out at me is your sorrow, your recognition of what her limitations really are and how much they will impact her life. I think, from my own experience, as mom's we face those limits incrementally as we can accept them. Each step has grief because not only do our difficult child's have to give up certain expectations they have about their lives, we have to give up some of our parental expectations about what we would like for them too. And, it's the unknown, we aren't sure of how it will all turn out. We're uncertain and therefore, it's out of our control. We just don't know. All the ways we feel safe are threatened with what we don't know and what we're beginning to come to grips with is now becoming real. Jo, I thought I remembered you speaking about you having a therapist. Perhaps it might be a good idea for you to see this person to move through your feelings about your difficult child's future and your fears and concerns. Once you can grieve and express what you're feeling, perhaps then you and your difficult child can talk about your fears which may allow her to see the realities so she can realize for herself exactly what she is dealing with and what she may have to do to stay healthy. It seems that the best way to handle this would be in a small step by small step fashion so everyone can grasp the realities and come to grips with it and make whatever changes will seem necessary. It's hard being a mother of a child who has "issues" ..... we have our own learning curve and healing and accepting process too. It makes it more difficult when you feel alone, that's a bad feeling, I know that one too. But, you have us, we really get it, so keep venting and expressing. We're sending our prayers and hugs for you and we're listening..............we're here..............and if it feels right, talk to your therapist............take care of you too.................HUGS.......... [/QUOTE]
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I am at a loss on what to do, if anything.
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