Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
i am so frustrated!!!!! yup venting......
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="dreamer" data-source="post: 197873" data-attributes="member: 1697"><p>Upfront I have to admit I have probably not read all your posts. BUT....</p><p>well, my experience with my 2 kids and our school----I can warn you, there ARE some schools that might KNOW what NEEDS to be done, but for a variety of reasons (usually financial reasons) they simply are not going to be cooperative and forthright about DOING what needs to be done. </p><p></p><p>And I need to chime in with my own opinion, - no teacher should be saying to you to not give the medications yur childs dr has Rx'ed- not EVER, not even to tell you to go herbal route, and no teacher should ever tell you TO medicate your child. They might be a teacher and have some education, and they might have experience with children but-- they are being paid in the capacity of teaching your child academics. You are paying someone else to be your medical care and advice givers. And there is a possibility your childs teachers have their own personal reasons and judgements about anything goin on with your child. And they also mght have their own personal biases and opinions, not necessarily based on facts re childhood disorders and treatment. It has not been all that many years since "back in the old days" when children were thought not to possibly be able to be mentally ill - and could not be diagnosis'ed until some magical older age, say 16? And many "professionals" were just so positive any child with any seeming mental illness symptoms was the product of crummy parenting. Or a disruptive or chaotic home life. </p><p></p><p>Since it does appear from your posts that your specific school personnel are not sounding very cooperative, you are going to HAVE to go by "the book" to the letter. There are very very specific ways to start the process to begin the journey to get your child an IEP. Your are going to have to learn these steps you must take to start the process and follow these steps to the letter. Perfectly- or, your childs school might wiggle out of doing what they should do. I am sad to say you are most likely going to have to hold your childs school to the grindstone- I mean doing every single legal step properly----haveing all your documentation in order- to support your childs needs from the school. It is not going to be easy or simple, it is not going to be fun and even if you DO follow every rule perfectly, the school sounds like they are STILL going to try to pretend they "got confused" "did not understand" "forgot" "misinterpreted" No, not every school behaves this way, but, some do. </p><p>You absolutely have to STOP talking to them, telling them things, becuz if they are less than cooperative minded- they can and will twist everything you say in a way to support the negative opinion of you and the situation to their benefit. They will take things out of context, they will misconstrue what you say. And the more you talk to any of them, the more info you give them to twist and use as ammunition against you and your child. They will turn around little things that you say.....</p><p>If they are especially malicious, they could possibly then begin to call CPS with twisted tales meant to make you look bad. This muddies the waters, makes things even more complicated and strange and takes focus off what your childs real and true educational needs are. You will lose precious time this way. Meanwhile if school is turning into a negative experience for your child, and this all continues to get worse, your child could end up being traumatized by the situation, which will make everything else just that much more difficult. A child with school induced PTSD or school phobia is even more difficult to handle and work with. </p><p></p><p>So, number 1, you must STOP talking or emailing or casually writing with anyone at all from school. You must make absoultely certain that NOTHING can be misconstrued or misread or misunderstood or taken some other way than the way YOU meant. </p><p>number 2, it is vital you educate yourself on the precise legal processs for requesting an IEP meeting. At this site is another forum for Special Education-----go there and read things posted there, post there and ask questions of sheila and martie. Your school district should have a handbook for the rights of a parent of a child with disabilities or ? something like that, and you need to get a copy of that and read it. </p><p>There is another website- wrightslaw or something, they also talk about IEPs etc. go there. </p><p>there are very specific laws about this and lots of specific rules. You will not get anywhere unless you follow the legal procedure to get your child true help. </p><p>It should not be this complicated and difficult, but..some school districts do make the whole thing difficult. (I could tell you such horror stories you would have nitemares for months and go running screaming) </p><p>Get your professionals on board with you- the doctors etc. Get them to help you, tell them the school is behaveing how they are, ask them for specific thigns to request - ask them for recommendations etc and ask them to help you get your child an IEP. </p><p></p><p>That all said? Getting an IEP is sometimes the EASY part in an uncooperative district. Once you HAVE an IEP- some schools play mind games about implementing the IEP and complying with it. Yes, thats illegal......thats a whole nother story. But until you GET an IEP noone can follow one. </p><p></p><p>I am afraid you have a lot of research to do. </p><p>(learning how to get an IEP) and then learning how to get them to comply with an IEP...and also educating the school on your childs specific disabilities. </p><p></p><p>Good luck to you, I am sure you are going to need a lot of luck......and you will have a lot of work to do. I'm sorry. I hate how we have our hands full with our poor ill childrens needs and then have to also take on such monumentalsks as getting them the help they need. It is SO unfair. so very wrong. It just stinks.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dreamer, post: 197873, member: 1697"] Upfront I have to admit I have probably not read all your posts. BUT.... well, my experience with my 2 kids and our school----I can warn you, there ARE some schools that might KNOW what NEEDS to be done, but for a variety of reasons (usually financial reasons) they simply are not going to be cooperative and forthright about DOING what needs to be done. And I need to chime in with my own opinion, - no teacher should be saying to you to not give the medications yur childs dr has Rx'ed- not EVER, not even to tell you to go herbal route, and no teacher should ever tell you TO medicate your child. They might be a teacher and have some education, and they might have experience with children but-- they are being paid in the capacity of teaching your child academics. You are paying someone else to be your medical care and advice givers. And there is a possibility your childs teachers have their own personal reasons and judgements about anything goin on with your child. And they also mght have their own personal biases and opinions, not necessarily based on facts re childhood disorders and treatment. It has not been all that many years since "back in the old days" when children were thought not to possibly be able to be mentally ill - and could not be diagnosis'ed until some magical older age, say 16? And many "professionals" were just so positive any child with any seeming mental illness symptoms was the product of crummy parenting. Or a disruptive or chaotic home life. Since it does appear from your posts that your specific school personnel are not sounding very cooperative, you are going to HAVE to go by "the book" to the letter. There are very very specific ways to start the process to begin the journey to get your child an IEP. Your are going to have to learn these steps you must take to start the process and follow these steps to the letter. Perfectly- or, your childs school might wiggle out of doing what they should do. I am sad to say you are most likely going to have to hold your childs school to the grindstone- I mean doing every single legal step properly----haveing all your documentation in order- to support your childs needs from the school. It is not going to be easy or simple, it is not going to be fun and even if you DO follow every rule perfectly, the school sounds like they are STILL going to try to pretend they "got confused" "did not understand" "forgot" "misinterpreted" No, not every school behaves this way, but, some do. You absolutely have to STOP talking to them, telling them things, becuz if they are less than cooperative minded- they can and will twist everything you say in a way to support the negative opinion of you and the situation to their benefit. They will take things out of context, they will misconstrue what you say. And the more you talk to any of them, the more info you give them to twist and use as ammunition against you and your child. They will turn around little things that you say..... If they are especially malicious, they could possibly then begin to call CPS with twisted tales meant to make you look bad. This muddies the waters, makes things even more complicated and strange and takes focus off what your childs real and true educational needs are. You will lose precious time this way. Meanwhile if school is turning into a negative experience for your child, and this all continues to get worse, your child could end up being traumatized by the situation, which will make everything else just that much more difficult. A child with school induced PTSD or school phobia is even more difficult to handle and work with. So, number 1, you must STOP talking or emailing or casually writing with anyone at all from school. You must make absoultely certain that NOTHING can be misconstrued or misread or misunderstood or taken some other way than the way YOU meant. number 2, it is vital you educate yourself on the precise legal processs for requesting an IEP meeting. At this site is another forum for Special Education-----go there and read things posted there, post there and ask questions of sheila and martie. Your school district should have a handbook for the rights of a parent of a child with disabilities or ? something like that, and you need to get a copy of that and read it. There is another website- wrightslaw or something, they also talk about IEPs etc. go there. there are very specific laws about this and lots of specific rules. You will not get anywhere unless you follow the legal procedure to get your child true help. It should not be this complicated and difficult, but..some school districts do make the whole thing difficult. (I could tell you such horror stories you would have nitemares for months and go running screaming) Get your professionals on board with you- the doctors etc. Get them to help you, tell them the school is behaveing how they are, ask them for specific thigns to request - ask them for recommendations etc and ask them to help you get your child an IEP. That all said? Getting an IEP is sometimes the EASY part in an uncooperative district. Once you HAVE an IEP- some schools play mind games about implementing the IEP and complying with it. Yes, thats illegal......thats a whole nother story. But until you GET an IEP noone can follow one. I am afraid you have a lot of research to do. (learning how to get an IEP) and then learning how to get them to comply with an IEP...and also educating the school on your childs specific disabilities. Good luck to you, I am sure you are going to need a lot of luck......and you will have a lot of work to do. I'm sorry. I hate how we have our hands full with our poor ill childrens needs and then have to also take on such monumentalsks as getting them the help they need. It is SO unfair. so very wrong. It just stinks. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
i am so frustrated!!!!! yup venting......
Top