Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
I am so sad and angry at the same time!
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="lovemysons" data-source="post: 764898" data-attributes="member: 3305"><p>Thank you Copa. </p><p></p><p>This is all started months ago when I got my grandchildren to be honest with me and tell me if they were in school or not. </p><p>I found out from my granddaughter that they were not enrolled this past year and that oldest grandson hasn’t been in school for years. In fact he is 16 and can barely do 3rd grade division and no multiplication in his head. We know this because my husband downloaded some worksheets for him to do on one of his recent last visits. </p><p></p><p>So my grandchildren and I really started talking about their futures. Missing out on an education and sitting in their rooms all day everyday doing nothing. And also needing counseling from all they’ve gone through with their mom and then their father’s death. </p><p></p><p>We talked and they decided they would like to live with my husband and I and go to school, get counseling, have opportunities to really start living with goals and a future in mind. </p><p>So we decided I would have a conversation with their mother about them living with us. </p><p></p><p>I called mom on the phone and told her we need to have a serious discussion about the kids and their futures. I told her all of my concerns and asked if the two oldest could live with us. She said, “ Not going to happen!” And hung up. </p><p></p><p>I texted my grandson about what she said and grandson said, “Then I will get emancipated.” </p><p></p><p>He then told his mom he wanted to get emancipated and she said, “Alright bro!” (Who talks to their child like this?) </p><p>She went towards him and he got scared and locked his bedroom door. I called him and he said, “Call the police.” </p><p></p><p>I called the police and they came to their grandma’s house (the mom’s mom). </p><p>My grandson went outside to tell them what happened and that he was afraid of his mom. </p><p>Then the police asked grandson’s mom to come out. That is when she lied and told the police that grandson just hit her 3 times. The police handcuffed my grandson and took him to jail. Mom did not press charges and when questioned over and over by police my grandson stuck by his story. </p><p>Grandson was then released to my mom’s house for a few days. While there he was interviewed by CPS and told them he had thought about suicide and even a way to do it. An overdose. </p><p>So this is when the CPS investigation started. </p><p></p><p>Unfortunately after a few days grandson returned home where his mom was. Grandson told me that mom had said she relapsed 4 months prior on Meth because she was sad but that if the kids told anyone she would kill herself. None of my grandchildren told CPS about mom’s drug use in their interviews because they were afraid for their mom’s safety. </p><p></p><p>CPS did do a drug test on mom but it was long after the investigation started. So she probably had time to get it out of her system. </p><p></p><p>Now CPS has closed their case and is not removing my grandchildren from the situation. They even say they can only suggest counseling for mom and the kids but can’t force it. They were useless. The system failed my grandchildren. </p><p></p><p>Copa I hope that my husband and I will be allowed to see our grandchildren again sometime soon but I doubt it. </p><p>Mom blames me for everything. </p><p>Now I can only text my grandchildren. </p><p></p><p>Middle granddaughter says mom gets irrational and attacks the person not the problem. She is afraid now to go to court for my husband and I to fight for custody. She is concerned that if we lose she still has to go home and face mom. </p><p></p><p>Grandson says he will just wait till the next time mom messes up and maybe gets caught and finally has repercussions. </p><p></p><p>I started that GoFundMe me page a few days ago in an effort to raise the $8,500 retainer fee for the family law firm lawyers and take mom to court. But now neither of my oldest grandchildren want to go to court. I will have gofund me refund the money that has been donated so far. I also shut down the page and have asked our Deni to get rid of the links on our board. </p><p></p><p>As an aside…I think my relationship with my own mother is irretrievably broken. She did not want to contribute anything to help fight for the kids and she can afford it. </p><p>I am still reeling over the fact that she was on vacation a few years ago when my son on the streets out of desperation called my mother for $50 and she said No! He had never called her and asked for money before. This was the last phone call he ever made to his grandmother. </p><p></p><p>Then a month before Jarod died I asked my mom if she would drive with me to California to pickup Jarod. I told her I would pay for everything. I even told her I think he’s close to death. She told me in response that he was no better off in a bedroom in our home than out on the streets and that she would not go. </p><p></p><p>I am beyond angry at my mom. </p><p>Like your mom was Copa, mine is extremely selfish and is only out for a good time in her life. She will tell you what YOU should do all day long while never lifting a finger herself. </p><p>She also neglected me most of my childhood while she partied and moved us around the country all the time. I had no stability and no stable friends growing up. I was always the new kid. </p><p></p><p>Like you I had an absent parent in my bio dad. I met him when I was 16 after my mom and he had divorced and we moved when I was 2 years old. He was a very self centered alcoholic. Couldn’t even give my an apology. Only blamed my mom for our estrangement. </p><p>When he died 10 years or so ago I also had that hole in my heart for what he could never give me. I mourned what never was. </p><p></p><p>Interestingly enough the month before my bio dad died my half sister who I barely know, asked me to come to his hospital bedside. I did. The only thing I asked for from him was a letter, a note a card, anything with his writing to me. I never got it. </p><p></p><p>This is why Jarod the grandchildren’s father, my son, had decided a few years before he died to write each of his children a letter so they would know how much he loved them always no matter what. So they would have some part of him in their possession because I never got that from my own bio dad and Jarod didn’t want to be remembered like my bio dad. </p><p></p><p>So that’s where things stand now. </p><p>Still praying. Seems that’s all I really ever can do.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="lovemysons, post: 764898, member: 3305"] Thank you Copa. This is all started months ago when I got my grandchildren to be honest with me and tell me if they were in school or not. I found out from my granddaughter that they were not enrolled this past year and that oldest grandson hasn’t been in school for years. In fact he is 16 and can barely do 3rd grade division and no multiplication in his head. We know this because my husband downloaded some worksheets for him to do on one of his recent last visits. So my grandchildren and I really started talking about their futures. Missing out on an education and sitting in their rooms all day everyday doing nothing. And also needing counseling from all they’ve gone through with their mom and then their father’s death. We talked and they decided they would like to live with my husband and I and go to school, get counseling, have opportunities to really start living with goals and a future in mind. So we decided I would have a conversation with their mother about them living with us. I called mom on the phone and told her we need to have a serious discussion about the kids and their futures. I told her all of my concerns and asked if the two oldest could live with us. She said, “ Not going to happen!” And hung up. I texted my grandson about what she said and grandson said, “Then I will get emancipated.” He then told his mom he wanted to get emancipated and she said, “Alright bro!” (Who talks to their child like this?) She went towards him and he got scared and locked his bedroom door. I called him and he said, “Call the police.” I called the police and they came to their grandma’s house (the mom’s mom). My grandson went outside to tell them what happened and that he was afraid of his mom. Then the police asked grandson’s mom to come out. That is when she lied and told the police that grandson just hit her 3 times. The police handcuffed my grandson and took him to jail. Mom did not press charges and when questioned over and over by police my grandson stuck by his story. Grandson was then released to my mom’s house for a few days. While there he was interviewed by CPS and told them he had thought about suicide and even a way to do it. An overdose. So this is when the CPS investigation started. Unfortunately after a few days grandson returned home where his mom was. Grandson told me that mom had said she relapsed 4 months prior on Meth because she was sad but that if the kids told anyone she would kill herself. None of my grandchildren told CPS about mom’s drug use in their interviews because they were afraid for their mom’s safety. CPS did do a drug test on mom but it was long after the investigation started. So she probably had time to get it out of her system. Now CPS has closed their case and is not removing my grandchildren from the situation. They even say they can only suggest counseling for mom and the kids but can’t force it. They were useless. The system failed my grandchildren. Copa I hope that my husband and I will be allowed to see our grandchildren again sometime soon but I doubt it. Mom blames me for everything. Now I can only text my grandchildren. Middle granddaughter says mom gets irrational and attacks the person not the problem. She is afraid now to go to court for my husband and I to fight for custody. She is concerned that if we lose she still has to go home and face mom. Grandson says he will just wait till the next time mom messes up and maybe gets caught and finally has repercussions. I started that GoFundMe me page a few days ago in an effort to raise the $8,500 retainer fee for the family law firm lawyers and take mom to court. But now neither of my oldest grandchildren want to go to court. I will have gofund me refund the money that has been donated so far. I also shut down the page and have asked our Deni to get rid of the links on our board. As an aside…I think my relationship with my own mother is irretrievably broken. She did not want to contribute anything to help fight for the kids and she can afford it. I am still reeling over the fact that she was on vacation a few years ago when my son on the streets out of desperation called my mother for $50 and she said No! He had never called her and asked for money before. This was the last phone call he ever made to his grandmother. Then a month before Jarod died I asked my mom if she would drive with me to California to pickup Jarod. I told her I would pay for everything. I even told her I think he’s close to death. She told me in response that he was no better off in a bedroom in our home than out on the streets and that she would not go. I am beyond angry at my mom. Like your mom was Copa, mine is extremely selfish and is only out for a good time in her life. She will tell you what YOU should do all day long while never lifting a finger herself. She also neglected me most of my childhood while she partied and moved us around the country all the time. I had no stability and no stable friends growing up. I was always the new kid. Like you I had an absent parent in my bio dad. I met him when I was 16 after my mom and he had divorced and we moved when I was 2 years old. He was a very self centered alcoholic. Couldn’t even give my an apology. Only blamed my mom for our estrangement. When he died 10 years or so ago I also had that hole in my heart for what he could never give me. I mourned what never was. Interestingly enough the month before my bio dad died my half sister who I barely know, asked me to come to his hospital bedside. I did. The only thing I asked for from him was a letter, a note a card, anything with his writing to me. I never got it. This is why Jarod the grandchildren’s father, my son, had decided a few years before he died to write each of his children a letter so they would know how much he loved them always no matter what. So they would have some part of him in their possession because I never got that from my own bio dad and Jarod didn’t want to be remembered like my bio dad. So that’s where things stand now. Still praying. Seems that’s all I really ever can do. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
I am so sad and angry at the same time!
Top