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I don't want to do this anymore
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 219555" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Heather - I really wish I had words of wisdom for you. I am just at such low-ebb these days, I'm plum out of ideas. Around here, it's 3+ months and counting until he's 18, so I'm just doing that last sprint to the "finish line" (not like there's really going to be a finish line, but it's a good thought anyway <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /> ).</p><p> </p><p>It sounds like Wynter has a serious case of anywhere-but-here-itis. All her problems are external and if the setting changed, life would be better for her. It's a fallacy - her problems will follow her but of course getting any kid to see that is darn near impossible. </p><p> </p><p>I just don't know. What we tried to do with thank you didn't work (or hasn't yet, anyway). But I don't know what else to do other than keep presenting options for treatment, choices for him to make, and keep slogging away. I think letting some natural consequences hit makes sense at age 13, especially in terms of school. </p><p> </p><p>I don't know what to suggest about the constant verbal barrage. thank you's been out of the home so long, I've gotten used to just ending telephone conversations when he starts his junk.</p><p> </p><p>Respite would be ideal for you, but I understand that it's tough to come by for some folks.</p><p> </p><p>Just a funny that I remembered while reading your post. During one of thank you's short stints living at home (at age 12), we had weekly in-home therapy. During one of the sessions, thank you advised case mgr that he wanted to be put up for adoption because then his life would be perfect. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/rofl.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":rofl:" title="rofl :rofl:" data-shortname=":rofl:" /> CM, bless her heart, just looked at him with her jaw dropped - then ran over the litany of hospitalizations, school placements, treatment placements, and problematic behaviors, and then asked him who on earth besides his parents did he think would not only put up with all that but also continue to advocate for him. It was a priceless moment, probably the first time anyone besides us really hit him with a hard dose of reality. </p><p> </p><p>We just keep plugging away. Despite all the blame our kids heap on us, their nastiness, their mouths (duct tape was always a fantasy of mine), their ingratitude, and their flat out defiance... we do what we're supposed to do - advocate, seek out treatment and education, and keep trying to push them to be the people they can be.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 219555, member: 8"] Heather - I really wish I had words of wisdom for you. I am just at such low-ebb these days, I'm plum out of ideas. Around here, it's 3+ months and counting until he's 18, so I'm just doing that last sprint to the "finish line" (not like there's really going to be a finish line, but it's a good thought anyway ;) ). It sounds like Wynter has a serious case of anywhere-but-here-itis. All her problems are external and if the setting changed, life would be better for her. It's a fallacy - her problems will follow her but of course getting any kid to see that is darn near impossible. I just don't know. What we tried to do with thank you didn't work (or hasn't yet, anyway). But I don't know what else to do other than keep presenting options for treatment, choices for him to make, and keep slogging away. I think letting some natural consequences hit makes sense at age 13, especially in terms of school. I don't know what to suggest about the constant verbal barrage. thank you's been out of the home so long, I've gotten used to just ending telephone conversations when he starts his junk. Respite would be ideal for you, but I understand that it's tough to come by for some folks. Just a funny that I remembered while reading your post. During one of thank you's short stints living at home (at age 12), we had weekly in-home therapy. During one of the sessions, thank you advised case mgr that he wanted to be put up for adoption because then his life would be perfect. :rofl: CM, bless her heart, just looked at him with her jaw dropped - then ran over the litany of hospitalizations, school placements, treatment placements, and problematic behaviors, and then asked him who on earth besides his parents did he think would not only put up with all that but also continue to advocate for him. It was a priceless moment, probably the first time anyone besides us really hit him with a hard dose of reality. We just keep plugging away. Despite all the blame our kids heap on us, their nastiness, their mouths (duct tape was always a fantasy of mine), their ingratitude, and their flat out defiance... we do what we're supposed to do - advocate, seek out treatment and education, and keep trying to push them to be the people they can be. [/QUOTE]
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