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General Parenting
I feel like an island...(long)
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 142517" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>Why does KT still have access to a phone? Sorry, but if my daughter were to be calling my friends and family about how unfair her life was, I'd make sure her life was just a little more unfair. The landline would have the receiver with me at all times. Unless she's paying for it, the cell phone would be mine until I felt it was being used appropriately.</p><p> </p><p>I also wouldn't bother talking to my mother. Mine can be toxic in the sense she doesn't like the way my daughter has behaved through the years and really doesn't believe she is her granddaughter. It hurts, but I've learned to deal with it. However, even today I won't answer a call from my mother. I let it go to voice mail -- if the message is about my daughter, I don't return the call. I certainly don't waste the effort to call her and complain about my daughter -- I never get a response that is even remotely helpful, so why bother. When we do talk now, it is general.</p><p> </p><p>As to your husband, sometimes humor is the only form of survival available. Obviously, he is feeling the pain or he wouldn't feel that baby feet will trample all over you. It may not be the best way to acknowledge the pain but at least he sees you're hurting.</p><p> </p><p>Believe it or not, the odds are that it will get better. KT will grow up. She may even discover what an awesome mother you have been. It won't be any time soon, but odds are it will happen. Until then, you can always imagine how good it would be to lock her in a box until she grows up. I just used to imagine throttling mine. It did become a joke -- I'd get a look and she'd tell me she was being strangled again, right? I'd agree.</p><p> </p><p>For now, do what you have to do for you. Maybe your mother should take KT for spring break or, better yet, all summer. Who knows, she might actually understand how unfair she's being. Do try to remember that most of us see one major advantage to grandparenting -- we get to do all the spoiling we wanted to of our own children and know that our grandkids will turn out just fine because they have good parents. I honestly wouldn't be surprised that somewhere inside of your mother that logic is at play, too.</p><p> </p><p>For now, some gentle hugs. Go take a nice, long relaxing bath and then get those phones away from your daughter!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 142517, member: 3626"] Why does KT still have access to a phone? Sorry, but if my daughter were to be calling my friends and family about how unfair her life was, I'd make sure her life was just a little more unfair. The landline would have the receiver with me at all times. Unless she's paying for it, the cell phone would be mine until I felt it was being used appropriately. I also wouldn't bother talking to my mother. Mine can be toxic in the sense she doesn't like the way my daughter has behaved through the years and really doesn't believe she is her granddaughter. It hurts, but I've learned to deal with it. However, even today I won't answer a call from my mother. I let it go to voice mail -- if the message is about my daughter, I don't return the call. I certainly don't waste the effort to call her and complain about my daughter -- I never get a response that is even remotely helpful, so why bother. When we do talk now, it is general. As to your husband, sometimes humor is the only form of survival available. Obviously, he is feeling the pain or he wouldn't feel that baby feet will trample all over you. It may not be the best way to acknowledge the pain but at least he sees you're hurting. Believe it or not, the odds are that it will get better. KT will grow up. She may even discover what an awesome mother you have been. It won't be any time soon, but odds are it will happen. Until then, you can always imagine how good it would be to lock her in a box until she grows up. I just used to imagine throttling mine. It did become a joke -- I'd get a look and she'd tell me she was being strangled again, right? I'd agree. For now, do what you have to do for you. Maybe your mother should take KT for spring break or, better yet, all summer. Who knows, she might actually understand how unfair she's being. Do try to remember that most of us see one major advantage to grandparenting -- we get to do all the spoiling we wanted to of our own children and know that our grandkids will turn out just fine because they have good parents. I honestly wouldn't be surprised that somewhere inside of your mother that logic is at play, too. For now, some gentle hugs. Go take a nice, long relaxing bath and then get those phones away from your daughter! [/QUOTE]
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