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I feel like I'm drowning
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<blockquote data-quote="KFld" data-source="post: 72694" data-attributes="member: 2442"><p>We spread my moms ashes last night and it was a beautiful night for it. It couldn't have been any more perfect. I know she was smiling as the sunset. </p><p></p><p>My husband drove the boat out there and then on the way back up the dock started telling me how he hopes my going to counseling will help me decide what I want and that I need to know that he hopes I choose to save our marriage. I told him I have not had 2 seconds to myself to grieve for my mother or process the fact that he had an affair and that I couldn't even begin to think about what I want right now. In the next breath he said, do you need me to stay home tonight, or do you mind if I go out. I told him I don't care what he does. I guess I just assumed that after seeing how emotional it was for me to really say goodbye to my mom, he may just hang home with my dad and all, but I guess that would have cramped his style. Then he told me his brother has a place for him to stay. Thank god I never mentioned the sharing the house for awhile. He will move out next week and right now I can't wait. I need room to breath. I really feel like I'm drowning. I have not had one minute to myself in 2 weeks to process anything. The only time I have to myself is when I go to bed at night and that is when I start thinking and can't sleep. I am truley exhausted and cannot wait until next week. </p><p></p><p>My counseling session went great. Learned lots more about myself. No matter how bad I feel when I go there, I walk out a different person :smile:</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="KFld, post: 72694, member: 2442"] We spread my moms ashes last night and it was a beautiful night for it. It couldn't have been any more perfect. I know she was smiling as the sunset. My husband drove the boat out there and then on the way back up the dock started telling me how he hopes my going to counseling will help me decide what I want and that I need to know that he hopes I choose to save our marriage. I told him I have not had 2 seconds to myself to grieve for my mother or process the fact that he had an affair and that I couldn't even begin to think about what I want right now. In the next breath he said, do you need me to stay home tonight, or do you mind if I go out. I told him I don't care what he does. I guess I just assumed that after seeing how emotional it was for me to really say goodbye to my mom, he may just hang home with my dad and all, but I guess that would have cramped his style. Then he told me his brother has a place for him to stay. Thank god I never mentioned the sharing the house for awhile. He will move out next week and right now I can't wait. I need room to breath. I really feel like I'm drowning. I have not had one minute to myself in 2 weeks to process anything. The only time I have to myself is when I go to bed at night and that is when I start thinking and can't sleep. I am truley exhausted and cannot wait until next week. My counseling session went great. Learned lots more about myself. No matter how bad I feel when I go there, I walk out a different person [img]:smile:[/img] [/QUOTE]
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