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I hate difficult child right now...
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<blockquote data-quote="Mattsmom277" data-source="post: 570918" data-attributes="member: 4264"><p>major hugs. i am in northern ontario too and i know how hard services can be to find. I did myself call cas when my then difficult child was 12. This got me rapidly off wait lists and also provided a back up plan, of therapeutic foster setting while awaiting a Residential Treatment Center (RTC) bed, should the need arise. Which it did and he ended up placed, by me, at a therapeutic placement for a few months. He ended up not going into Residential Treatment Center (RTC). I don't know what part of the north you are in, but there are a couple around, although likely you would have to send difficult child out of town. There is one in my city as well as a main hub type facility about an hour and a half north of her which is part of a larger child psychiatric program/center. I think meanwhile that doing what you can to make it easiest as possible for bio mom to regain custody, is a good idea. If she is clean and has a suitable housing arrangement and can provide necessities, I think I would probably recommend that you go with her to the court where you can file a custody change "on consent" without an attorney and without requiring seeing the judge. It is effective immediately. I went through the on consent process when difficult child went to try living with his dad, it took all of about 20 minutes which included filling in the paperwork. If that is possible for you and bio mom is accepting of difficult child returning to her, I suggest seeing if this may be a quick immediate option in order to rehouse difficult child. Your husband of course can still be supportive in helping find services for difficult child etc. But he would be out of hte home, away from the other children (a must really) and afterward you and your husband can work out just how he is going to have visitation where HE parents and where you and your children aren't in any fashion exposed to negativity. </p><p></p><p>Best of luck, you are in a terrible position in the middle of all of this. Glad you found this site. There are so many wonderful people to lean on and who have wonderful insights to all kinds of situations. Hang in there.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mattsmom277, post: 570918, member: 4264"] major hugs. i am in northern ontario too and i know how hard services can be to find. I did myself call cas when my then difficult child was 12. This got me rapidly off wait lists and also provided a back up plan, of therapeutic foster setting while awaiting a Residential Treatment Center (RTC) bed, should the need arise. Which it did and he ended up placed, by me, at a therapeutic placement for a few months. He ended up not going into Residential Treatment Center (RTC). I don't know what part of the north you are in, but there are a couple around, although likely you would have to send difficult child out of town. There is one in my city as well as a main hub type facility about an hour and a half north of her which is part of a larger child psychiatric program/center. I think meanwhile that doing what you can to make it easiest as possible for bio mom to regain custody, is a good idea. If she is clean and has a suitable housing arrangement and can provide necessities, I think I would probably recommend that you go with her to the court where you can file a custody change "on consent" without an attorney and without requiring seeing the judge. It is effective immediately. I went through the on consent process when difficult child went to try living with his dad, it took all of about 20 minutes which included filling in the paperwork. If that is possible for you and bio mom is accepting of difficult child returning to her, I suggest seeing if this may be a quick immediate option in order to rehouse difficult child. Your husband of course can still be supportive in helping find services for difficult child etc. But he would be out of hte home, away from the other children (a must really) and afterward you and your husband can work out just how he is going to have visitation where HE parents and where you and your children aren't in any fashion exposed to negativity. Best of luck, you are in a terrible position in the middle of all of this. Glad you found this site. There are so many wonderful people to lean on and who have wonderful insights to all kinds of situations. Hang in there. [/QUOTE]
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