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i just dont' know
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 406156" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>I know we're talking about you stepping back and not being Mrs Fix-It for them all, but I'm wondering, Jen - can you go to husband's therapist appointment with him a couple of times? Not to take over or anything, but simply to provide another angle on the issues and perhaps give the therapist a different insight from the "poor me" he's undoubtedly getting. I'm thinking that husband and this counsellor could be in a rut with husband not knowing how to open up and really talk about the deeper issues. It's a bloke thing - they really hate having to show any weakness to anyone outside their family. So they either toughen up and talk about trivialities, or they go into full-on whine mode, but again about practical things, not about how they really feel. But once you open the door for him, then you can step back and let the counsellor handle it again. I mean, the counsellor handles it all anyway, but has to KNOW about the real stuff before he/she can help. Also, if the counsellor is male, this can aggravate the problem of a bloke not opening up.</p><p></p><p>As for easy child and the dogs - I fully agree, she has to sort this out or the dogs go to the shelter. Nobody is going to want a dog that is totally untrained. Also, if easy child keeps throwing tantrums, then this is a bad environment for the dogs and they need to be out of there. They create more stress, they cost money and they also add to the chaos. easy child needs to really think about WHY she wanted the dogs, and to make her own choices.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 406156, member: 1991"] I know we're talking about you stepping back and not being Mrs Fix-It for them all, but I'm wondering, Jen - can you go to husband's therapist appointment with him a couple of times? Not to take over or anything, but simply to provide another angle on the issues and perhaps give the therapist a different insight from the "poor me" he's undoubtedly getting. I'm thinking that husband and this counsellor could be in a rut with husband not knowing how to open up and really talk about the deeper issues. It's a bloke thing - they really hate having to show any weakness to anyone outside their family. So they either toughen up and talk about trivialities, or they go into full-on whine mode, but again about practical things, not about how they really feel. But once you open the door for him, then you can step back and let the counsellor handle it again. I mean, the counsellor handles it all anyway, but has to KNOW about the real stuff before he/she can help. Also, if the counsellor is male, this can aggravate the problem of a bloke not opening up. As for easy child and the dogs - I fully agree, she has to sort this out or the dogs go to the shelter. Nobody is going to want a dog that is totally untrained. Also, if easy child keeps throwing tantrums, then this is a bad environment for the dogs and they need to be out of there. They create more stress, they cost money and they also add to the chaos. easy child needs to really think about WHY she wanted the dogs, and to make her own choices. Marg [/QUOTE]
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