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<blockquote data-quote="Steely" data-source="post: 486271" data-attributes="member: 3301"><p>I thought about contacting his counselor too, but I know she won't talk to me without his consent, which she would have to ask him for, therefore he would know I am once again involved in his mental therapy. I really want him to "own" this journey. He has never done anything that has been completely his own. I have always been in the sidelines saying, well, the counselor "said". You know? I will definitely talk to my own counselor about it, but she is on my poo list right now, and I can barely work out my own issues with her.</p><p></p><p>Yes, this is definitely not what I was expecting in the journey of my difficult child. He has always been hateful, aggressive, a bully, etc. His counselor believes that perhaps he is not BiPolar, but the repeated abuse when he was young, set him up for a lifetime of acting in a fight or flight mode - which has caused so many of the issues. This is all so revolutionary to me. Deep - and life changing. Yet, it makes sense. I have told doctors this repeatedly, that his anxiety is the root of a lot of his behavior problems, along with dietary allergies. The older he has gotten the more he has figured all of this out on his own. Like he has a very short list of things he can eat, that don't give him a headache - he figured this out. When he was little, he would eat those same things and become even more agitated and more likely to act out. </p><p></p><p>He talked to his counselor about how the anti-anxiety make him crazy (literally) - and she has a theory that it is not so much the chemicals that adversely affect him, but the attempt to smolder an emotion that is demanding to be released. Hmmmm..... Not sure. But regardless - he really, really can't take anything in that benzo class without flipping his lid - so he is going to have to do this the hard way.</p><p></p><p>The only plus is that his best friend M., was in the same Residential Treatment Center (RTC) as Matt. So they call each other a lot and act as counselors to one another. He will call M. before me, but M., works and goes to school, so he is not always available.</p><p></p><p>I don't know, I can say it is exhausting for me - and probably for him too.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Steely, post: 486271, member: 3301"] I thought about contacting his counselor too, but I know she won't talk to me without his consent, which she would have to ask him for, therefore he would know I am once again involved in his mental therapy. I really want him to "own" this journey. He has never done anything that has been completely his own. I have always been in the sidelines saying, well, the counselor "said". You know? I will definitely talk to my own counselor about it, but she is on my poo list right now, and I can barely work out my own issues with her. Yes, this is definitely not what I was expecting in the journey of my difficult child. He has always been hateful, aggressive, a bully, etc. His counselor believes that perhaps he is not BiPolar, but the repeated abuse when he was young, set him up for a lifetime of acting in a fight or flight mode - which has caused so many of the issues. This is all so revolutionary to me. Deep - and life changing. Yet, it makes sense. I have told doctors this repeatedly, that his anxiety is the root of a lot of his behavior problems, along with dietary allergies. The older he has gotten the more he has figured all of this out on his own. Like he has a very short list of things he can eat, that don't give him a headache - he figured this out. When he was little, he would eat those same things and become even more agitated and more likely to act out. He talked to his counselor about how the anti-anxiety make him crazy (literally) - and she has a theory that it is not so much the chemicals that adversely affect him, but the attempt to smolder an emotion that is demanding to be released. Hmmmm..... Not sure. But regardless - he really, really can't take anything in that benzo class without flipping his lid - so he is going to have to do this the hard way. The only plus is that his best friend M., was in the same Residential Treatment Center (RTC) as Matt. So they call each other a lot and act as counselors to one another. He will call M. before me, but M., works and goes to school, so he is not always available. I don't know, I can say it is exhausting for me - and probably for him too. [/QUOTE]
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