Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
I'd almost forgotten how diff my difficult child was ...
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 104220" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Interestingly, difficult child 3 was a very good baby. A dream of a baby.</p><p></p><p>They had all been different - I had been desperate to have kids and longed for easy child to be born so I could cuddle her. Instead, I got a baby who was too eager to explore the world, to waste time being cuddled. She would only cuddle while I was feeding her, she would soon push away to get down on the floor to play. She was constantly searching for mental stimulation. I worked full-time and had her placed in long day care five minutes from my job, so I could go and feed her whenever she needed it. She soon settled into a pattern that coincided with work breaks.</p><p></p><p>difficult child 1 - my cuddler (or so I thought at first). Turned out, he cuddled out of fear and insecurity. He attached tightly to one lady at the centre, he would scream if she was out of the room. They had a terrible time with him when she took her lunch break. The centre director was angry with her for letting it happen, but the lady just didn't know how this had happened.</p><p>I know now, with autism these kids will sometimes attach very tightly, very deeply, very fast. To a person, a place, a toy, an idea.</p><p></p><p>easy child 2/difficult child 2 - not quite perfect. Would cuddle happily, often asked for cuddles when it wasn't convenient though (even into hr late teens!). A charmer, considerate of others but very fixed with routines. Did not like sleeping although she needed it. Would scream herself to sleep sitting up, then wake as she fell and her head hit the pillow. And start all over again. I can't wait for her to have kids - her fiancé is ADHD as well, this should be interesting.</p><p></p><p>difficult child 3 - in the hospital, only a few days old, he settled into a routine of sleeping for six hours, waking quietly and being fed, staying awake to play, be bathed and have a second feed, then sleeping another six hours. Around the clock, day after day. He was alert and looking around, especially looking at flickering light patterns such as light through the trees. Happy to be cuddled but at 3 months old worked out how to put himself to sleep when he was ready and would almost leap out of my arms into his cot and go to sleep straight away.</p><p>I thought I finally had the perfect baby. He watched game shows on TV, which we thought was cute and a funny coincidence as he was only a few months old; but he never stopped watching the game shows. He was absorbed by music, soothed by it from his earliest days. Sat on my lap as I played piano, so he began to touch the keys not as a baby would (bashing at them) but softly, playing chords. Similarly with the computer - he began playing a baby computer program before his first birthday, was reading numbers and letters before his second birthday. Well before, we're not sure when. Reprogrammed the TV tuner at about the same age, began to functionally use a lot of electronic equipment at the same age (VCR, DVD player, for example). Learned to hack past our password protection by 3 years old. But still very little language and only jargon speech.</p><p></p><p>Then the tantrums that came out of frustration. His, I mean. I only threw my tantrums at health professionals who got in my way.</p><p></p><p>I do not know what a normal child is like. I did help raise my sisters' kids, but that was a long time ago. I remember milestones such as first steps, but I don't remember the early language development, the early communication and early social development. I'm used to kids who could read before they went to school, used to kids who began school already accomplished at what the rest of the class was consolidating. And used to kids who couldn't cope with change, not without a lot of support, talking-to and encouragement. Used to kids with phobias and obsessions. Used to travelling with a towel in the car for difficult child 3, a teddy and pillow for easy child 2/difficult child 2 (at 21, she STILL has to travel with the same teddy and the same pillow) and an animal-free zone for difficult child 1 (thankfully, he has turned this phobia into an obsession - the aversion therapy worked a little TOO well!). And a easy child who bossed everybody and insisted on control in her environment!</p><p></p><p>husband & I are having the quiet rundown now to grandchildren. It will be very interesting!</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 104220, member: 1991"] Interestingly, difficult child 3 was a very good baby. A dream of a baby. They had all been different - I had been desperate to have kids and longed for easy child to be born so I could cuddle her. Instead, I got a baby who was too eager to explore the world, to waste time being cuddled. She would only cuddle while I was feeding her, she would soon push away to get down on the floor to play. She was constantly searching for mental stimulation. I worked full-time and had her placed in long day care five minutes from my job, so I could go and feed her whenever she needed it. She soon settled into a pattern that coincided with work breaks. difficult child 1 - my cuddler (or so I thought at first). Turned out, he cuddled out of fear and insecurity. He attached tightly to one lady at the centre, he would scream if she was out of the room. They had a terrible time with him when she took her lunch break. The centre director was angry with her for letting it happen, but the lady just didn't know how this had happened. I know now, with autism these kids will sometimes attach very tightly, very deeply, very fast. To a person, a place, a toy, an idea. easy child 2/difficult child 2 - not quite perfect. Would cuddle happily, often asked for cuddles when it wasn't convenient though (even into hr late teens!). A charmer, considerate of others but very fixed with routines. Did not like sleeping although she needed it. Would scream herself to sleep sitting up, then wake as she fell and her head hit the pillow. And start all over again. I can't wait for her to have kids - her fiancé is ADHD as well, this should be interesting. difficult child 3 - in the hospital, only a few days old, he settled into a routine of sleeping for six hours, waking quietly and being fed, staying awake to play, be bathed and have a second feed, then sleeping another six hours. Around the clock, day after day. He was alert and looking around, especially looking at flickering light patterns such as light through the trees. Happy to be cuddled but at 3 months old worked out how to put himself to sleep when he was ready and would almost leap out of my arms into his cot and go to sleep straight away. I thought I finally had the perfect baby. He watched game shows on TV, which we thought was cute and a funny coincidence as he was only a few months old; but he never stopped watching the game shows. He was absorbed by music, soothed by it from his earliest days. Sat on my lap as I played piano, so he began to touch the keys not as a baby would (bashing at them) but softly, playing chords. Similarly with the computer - he began playing a baby computer program before his first birthday, was reading numbers and letters before his second birthday. Well before, we're not sure when. Reprogrammed the TV tuner at about the same age, began to functionally use a lot of electronic equipment at the same age (VCR, DVD player, for example). Learned to hack past our password protection by 3 years old. But still very little language and only jargon speech. Then the tantrums that came out of frustration. His, I mean. I only threw my tantrums at health professionals who got in my way. I do not know what a normal child is like. I did help raise my sisters' kids, but that was a long time ago. I remember milestones such as first steps, but I don't remember the early language development, the early communication and early social development. I'm used to kids who could read before they went to school, used to kids who began school already accomplished at what the rest of the class was consolidating. And used to kids who couldn't cope with change, not without a lot of support, talking-to and encouragement. Used to kids with phobias and obsessions. Used to travelling with a towel in the car for difficult child 3, a teddy and pillow for easy child 2/difficult child 2 (at 21, she STILL has to travel with the same teddy and the same pillow) and an animal-free zone for difficult child 1 (thankfully, he has turned this phobia into an obsession - the aversion therapy worked a little TOO well!). And a easy child who bossed everybody and insisted on control in her environment! husband & I are having the quiet rundown now to grandchildren. It will be very interesting! Marg [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
I'd almost forgotten how diff my difficult child was ...
Top