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General Parenting
If only my skin were thicker
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 116743" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>If you can't develop thick skin, fake it the best way you can. Pretend the venom is honey; change the words in your mind into something loving; pretend it is someone other than you child speaking. Do remember that he is saying them to you because you are the "safe" one, the one who will love him no matter what is said and done.</p><p></p><p>I used to drive my daughter crazy by saying very sweetly, "Thank you, sweetie. I'm glad you feel safe sharing that with me." Nothing more, nothing less, in a calm, soft voice. And I would say this every time she started spewing. It took some time, but the venom has slowed down. I took the "fun" out of it.</p><p></p><p>A lot of the time, I really don't believe they mean the words they say. Sometimes they're afraid of being and giving love. Sometimes they're rejecting you before you reject them. Sometimes they want to hurt because they're hurting. Sometimes it's frustration.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 116743, member: 3626"] If you can't develop thick skin, fake it the best way you can. Pretend the venom is honey; change the words in your mind into something loving; pretend it is someone other than you child speaking. Do remember that he is saying them to you because you are the "safe" one, the one who will love him no matter what is said and done. I used to drive my daughter crazy by saying very sweetly, "Thank you, sweetie. I'm glad you feel safe sharing that with me." Nothing more, nothing less, in a calm, soft voice. And I would say this every time she started spewing. It took some time, but the venom has slowed down. I took the "fun" out of it. A lot of the time, I really don't believe they mean the words they say. Sometimes they're afraid of being and giving love. Sometimes they're rejecting you before you reject them. Sometimes they want to hurt because they're hurting. Sometimes it's frustration. [/QUOTE]
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If only my skin were thicker
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