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I'm bruised and cut, REALLY BAD DAY
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 471324" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I am sending bg hugs. I know how sore and scared you are. been there done that only my child didn't have the reasons to be violent that yours does. Mine did it by choice and it was not dependent on any medication because he did it on and off of a lot of different medications and no medications. </p><p></p><p>Your neighbors are amazing! I am so impressed. Be sure to let them know that all of us here truly appreciate how caring and helpful they are. </p><p></p><p>Your doctor is also amazing. If he needs to be in a hospital it needs to be the one she can see him at. She should be able to help with that. I can't think of our docs who would have texted from vacation. </p><p></p><p>Buddy, I KNOW you don't want to talk or think about this. I also understand that the violence was due to a seizure and NOT from any choice of difficult children. You still have to start thinking about long term care. It is likely that you won't be able to handle him if he gets much bigger. No one person could. Loving him, or him loving you has little to do with it. There is every chance that he might flip this way with a seizure and cause permanent damage to you. Then, where will he go when you are recovering? I hope that the local police are VERY AWARE that his behaviors are due to brain injury and he is NOT violent by choice. You need to speak to the police chief and whomever is the head of the local police station to be SURE they understand that his violent behavior is because he has seizures in the part of the brain that controls this behavior. Otherwise if he were to hurt you so that you needed an ambulance, they might put him in jail. Even at 14 kids are sent to prison. Or to juvie facilities that are as bad or worse than adult prisons (the one for kids who do serious crimes is a LOT worse than the max security prison here according to my stepmil who volunteers in both of them and around the world with prison systems.).</p><p></p><p>Is there anyone who would be his guardian if something happened to you? Someone the neighbors could notify if something happened, so that difficult child had someone to care for him and protect his legal rights in a situation like that?If you don't have a family member or friend who can do this, ask at the dept of human svcs or maybe call a lawyer to see if a guardian ad litem could be appointed who would only get involved if something happened to you. I don't think most police are trained to understand that a teen could seriously assault someone without ANY intent to harm, regardless of the words that poured from his mouth, that they can grasp that his brain is seizing and that is causing the violence AND the verbal garbage. </p><p></p><p>It may be that you and difficult child need someone with you full time, not just whatever hours the Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) workers are there. I know he won't hurt you on purpose, but if this isn't taken care of very soon I am worried that he will hurt you seriously and then you would have to fight the police and the courts to protect him. Maybe I am projecting, because it was a HUGE fear of mine with Wiz and we actually couldn't keep Wiz in our home safely. I just cannot see a good outcome for difficult child if you got seriously hurt. So maybe it is time to think about ways to ahve more help around so that it won't happen? </p><p></p><p>I am glad you were not more seriously hurt. in my opinion his reaction to the consequence of waiting before he could watch the race is so telling - tells me he has NO idea what happened and he sure didn't have any intention of hurting you. </p><p></p><p>Sending lots of hugs. I hope that you can find a medication to control these seizures. They are no fun for any of you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 471324, member: 1233"] I am sending bg hugs. I know how sore and scared you are. been there done that only my child didn't have the reasons to be violent that yours does. Mine did it by choice and it was not dependent on any medication because he did it on and off of a lot of different medications and no medications. Your neighbors are amazing! I am so impressed. Be sure to let them know that all of us here truly appreciate how caring and helpful they are. Your doctor is also amazing. If he needs to be in a hospital it needs to be the one she can see him at. She should be able to help with that. I can't think of our docs who would have texted from vacation. Buddy, I KNOW you don't want to talk or think about this. I also understand that the violence was due to a seizure and NOT from any choice of difficult children. You still have to start thinking about long term care. It is likely that you won't be able to handle him if he gets much bigger. No one person could. Loving him, or him loving you has little to do with it. There is every chance that he might flip this way with a seizure and cause permanent damage to you. Then, where will he go when you are recovering? I hope that the local police are VERY AWARE that his behaviors are due to brain injury and he is NOT violent by choice. You need to speak to the police chief and whomever is the head of the local police station to be SURE they understand that his violent behavior is because he has seizures in the part of the brain that controls this behavior. Otherwise if he were to hurt you so that you needed an ambulance, they might put him in jail. Even at 14 kids are sent to prison. Or to juvie facilities that are as bad or worse than adult prisons (the one for kids who do serious crimes is a LOT worse than the max security prison here according to my stepmil who volunteers in both of them and around the world with prison systems.). Is there anyone who would be his guardian if something happened to you? Someone the neighbors could notify if something happened, so that difficult child had someone to care for him and protect his legal rights in a situation like that?If you don't have a family member or friend who can do this, ask at the dept of human svcs or maybe call a lawyer to see if a guardian ad litem could be appointed who would only get involved if something happened to you. I don't think most police are trained to understand that a teen could seriously assault someone without ANY intent to harm, regardless of the words that poured from his mouth, that they can grasp that his brain is seizing and that is causing the violence AND the verbal garbage. It may be that you and difficult child need someone with you full time, not just whatever hours the Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) workers are there. I know he won't hurt you on purpose, but if this isn't taken care of very soon I am worried that he will hurt you seriously and then you would have to fight the police and the courts to protect him. Maybe I am projecting, because it was a HUGE fear of mine with Wiz and we actually couldn't keep Wiz in our home safely. I just cannot see a good outcome for difficult child if you got seriously hurt. So maybe it is time to think about ways to ahve more help around so that it won't happen? I am glad you were not more seriously hurt. in my opinion his reaction to the consequence of waiting before he could watch the race is so telling - tells me he has NO idea what happened and he sure didn't have any intention of hurting you. Sending lots of hugs. I hope that you can find a medication to control these seizures. They are no fun for any of you. [/QUOTE]
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I'm bruised and cut, REALLY BAD DAY
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