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i'm having a hard time with-this child
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<blockquote data-quote="Jena" data-source="post: 393204" data-attributes="member: 4514"><p>hi guys</p><p> </p><p>thanks i know confusing. i'm hoping once the therapist gets to know her and gets into her head a bit she can direct me better into what she thinks is the right thing to do.</p><p> </p><p>we'll c. all points made are valid. school, hmmm alot less anxiety for her with-o it to be honest. she craves friends yet school i'm not so sure. our block's bad too. it's an odd story we took this house because we had to to stay in the school district so difficult child could go to the middle school. which is funny because than she didn't wind up going anyway. we didnt' love the block, there were no kids her age here, it's a small house, yet it is on a col de sac and we wanted to do what was right for her. </p><p> </p><p>do i think home tutoring is way to go for her? yes i do academically. her anxiety level is almost non existant, she's thriving so far her brain's soaking it all up. its' amazing. clearly socially it isnt' the way to go though. i know that stability is key for her or any child. yet at the same time if a kid clearly hates where they live and has not really liked it for 4 years is it the right place to be? and yes her behaviors are the same everywhere. yet now 12 is here almost, it's time for her to find that friend she'll have thru her teen years. opportunity here for that now has dwindled down to not a whole lotta prospects out there. prior to her eating disorder we enrolled her in cheerleading. well guess what nasty girls from school were in it, and she faltered and walked off the field. gave up, anxiety thru roof. felt outta place.</p><p> </p><p>i'll give her credit she is a very smart girl and knows how to manuver i taught her to be social, que's she misses etc. so initially she tried hanging with the cooler bunch of kids in school. well that didnt' last long. they'd ask why dont you go in reg. door at school, than they found her pull up at a sleepover, needless to say she got super clingy and they stopped calling. she also didnt' like how mean they were to other kids. good for her i thought.</p><p> </p><p>than she tried thru kids she met in anxiety group in school past few years. yet those kids were too much the other way. one had asperger's and well played next to difficult child not with-her. so that friendship tanked. the other's were too anxiety ridden for her. where does the happy medium lie when you dont' have alot of options? it's hard to say.</p><p> </p><p>i feel very strongly she needs a clean shot at the life she wants. she's told me her hopes and dreams for now and the future. i have explained cart before horse scenario. yet i know what she wants to shoot for. </p><p> </p><p>a new neighborhood, on a new block that we would highly investigate to ensure kids lived on it (whether or not friendships would form, who knows; yet potential would be there), the opportunity to begin anew without kids knowing about her pull ups, or anxiety issues or lack of sleep. my thought was clean her up for once and for all, get her stable on either a medication or natural whatever works. i def. have my supports in place now like never before. than plop her in there and keep fingers crossed.</p><p> </p><p>see my thought process?? also if we did move we'd go closer to husband's job, less time on road for him, closer to the store, and more of a chance to have a family life because he'd be closer. easy child isnt' a concern because she'll have a car for college in september and her closest friend around corner is heading to college in summer.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Jena, post: 393204, member: 4514"] hi guys thanks i know confusing. i'm hoping once the therapist gets to know her and gets into her head a bit she can direct me better into what she thinks is the right thing to do. we'll c. all points made are valid. school, hmmm alot less anxiety for her with-o it to be honest. she craves friends yet school i'm not so sure. our block's bad too. it's an odd story we took this house because we had to to stay in the school district so difficult child could go to the middle school. which is funny because than she didn't wind up going anyway. we didnt' love the block, there were no kids her age here, it's a small house, yet it is on a col de sac and we wanted to do what was right for her. do i think home tutoring is way to go for her? yes i do academically. her anxiety level is almost non existant, she's thriving so far her brain's soaking it all up. its' amazing. clearly socially it isnt' the way to go though. i know that stability is key for her or any child. yet at the same time if a kid clearly hates where they live and has not really liked it for 4 years is it the right place to be? and yes her behaviors are the same everywhere. yet now 12 is here almost, it's time for her to find that friend she'll have thru her teen years. opportunity here for that now has dwindled down to not a whole lotta prospects out there. prior to her eating disorder we enrolled her in cheerleading. well guess what nasty girls from school were in it, and she faltered and walked off the field. gave up, anxiety thru roof. felt outta place. i'll give her credit she is a very smart girl and knows how to manuver i taught her to be social, que's she misses etc. so initially she tried hanging with the cooler bunch of kids in school. well that didnt' last long. they'd ask why dont you go in reg. door at school, than they found her pull up at a sleepover, needless to say she got super clingy and they stopped calling. she also didnt' like how mean they were to other kids. good for her i thought. than she tried thru kids she met in anxiety group in school past few years. yet those kids were too much the other way. one had asperger's and well played next to difficult child not with-her. so that friendship tanked. the other's were too anxiety ridden for her. where does the happy medium lie when you dont' have alot of options? it's hard to say. i feel very strongly she needs a clean shot at the life she wants. she's told me her hopes and dreams for now and the future. i have explained cart before horse scenario. yet i know what she wants to shoot for. a new neighborhood, on a new block that we would highly investigate to ensure kids lived on it (whether or not friendships would form, who knows; yet potential would be there), the opportunity to begin anew without kids knowing about her pull ups, or anxiety issues or lack of sleep. my thought was clean her up for once and for all, get her stable on either a medication or natural whatever works. i def. have my supports in place now like never before. than plop her in there and keep fingers crossed. see my thought process?? also if we did move we'd go closer to husband's job, less time on road for him, closer to the store, and more of a chance to have a family life because he'd be closer. easy child isnt' a concern because she'll have a car for college in september and her closest friend around corner is heading to college in summer. [/QUOTE]
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