i gotta admit. beyond the not eating thing. she's super irritable because well she has no life. no friends. been contained for like 5 mos. now. so i get that. yet it's a fight all the time. i'm trying to do the smart thing and pick and chose my battles with-her yet that doesnt' always work. i have to sit down when i get a quiet minute and write up a rule thing just for me, what behavioral changes to make etc. a guideline. because i'm confused at different points in handling her as of late. she is going to be 12 in feb. yet she wets bed each night not intentionally and next day i have to stand there and argue with-her to takea shower or else she'll smell like pee. that to me should not be happening. yet she's sooo immature. than we have at night she can't sleep. we're working on solutions. yet if my door isnt' left open she gets anxiety ridden. literally her room is across from our's super small ranch house. so past 3 nites i've been closing it just to adjust her to your ok if i close my door kinda thing. yet she sits up all night long. she just is such a mess on so many levels. it's hard to even comprehend. we sit there talking, husband doesnt' feel it like i do let's face it hasnt' known her her entire life is the step dad he cares yet it's different. she's tried to reach out to two friends here, none are getting back to her. i talked to her new therapist about moving. giving her the chance to reinvent herself almost. she was pegged as the odd kid already here yet now with-being gone all these mos. i think honestly these kids will eat her alive and i do not think she will be able to function in that school again. i know i'm all over the map on this . reason for post i'm not sure. i just know besides getting her to eat alot has to change. i have to be stronger than i've been, draw my boundaries stronger for her own good and stop compensating for her mental illness. parenting with-guilt is bad or even just feeling bad for them. so, cart before horse i know that.gotta get her eating again, find medications or natural supplements that get her sleeping and stable yet than what? we cant' afford to buy. so if we rent we'r are the mercy of the owners. if we move into new neighborhood and she actually makes a friend what if the lease is up in 2 years and they wont' renew? see my point? it's a hard decision that i am pondering while going thru this.yet difficult child does state she doesnt' like this neighborhood always did to some extent. i get you can't run away from yourself. her problems will be her problems regardless where she goes. yet as she said she feels like she used up the area here. these kids here are rough, will indidate her with questions, probe her, etc. if she was ever to go back. any thoughts? also she's had alot of moves too. we left our hometown in queens to head to long island. than we were in a diff part of long island when husband and i met, we got engaged and moved in with him into this town. thing is it's the same everywhere for her.